


... so it goes

by duelistkingdom



Series: nanonwrimo 2020: 100k challenge [7]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! - All Media Types, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, and really bad at picking up romantic cues in general, anzu is a broadway star, atem always had his own body, atem's literally just chilling, duel monsters is just a popular card game and kaiba is still weird about it au, kaiba is really bad at friendship, minor wishshipping in the background, yugi is a rival ceo to kaiba au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:08:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 29,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27486283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/duelistkingdom/pseuds/duelistkingdom
Summary: getting alone time with your rival can be so hard sometimes, especially when you're a famous ceo who took over your father's company when you were a teenager. even more so when your rival's friends insist on being annoying.
Relationships: Atem/Kaiba Seto, Kaiba Seto/Yami Yuugi | Atem
Series: nanonwrimo 2020: 100k challenge [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995451
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	1. all eyes on you, my magician

**Author's Note:**

> i originally intended for this to be a one shot. but as the amount of words that went into this climbed... the more i realized this has to be a three shot of sorts. so enjoy part one of an accidental series! part two should be coming shortly!

This charity gala was boring and Seto envied his younger brother for having the excuse of homework to stay home. Seto almost wished he was still in high school and could claim that attending this event would divert away from his studies. If it weren’t for the fact that being at this event would draw positive press, Seto would’ve never agreed to come. He hated galas, really. He hated that everyone seemed to expect a boring tux out of him and got stares when he defied the boring basic black tux with something a little more suitable to his taste. For the most part, the gala was in a fairly dark room with what he assumed the organizers considered “mood lighting”. He considered tacky. He was on the verge of leaving when out of the corner of the eye, he saw Atem Nasser – son of some Egyptian politician that Seto never bothered to learn the name of, a full year older than Kaiba at 25 – entering, animatedly talking with his stupid friends. But that wasn’t what drew Seto’s eye towards him. No, what drew his eye to Atem (and almost everyone in this room) was the gold suit paired with literally no shirt underneath the jacket. He had on dangling earrings and if Seto wasn’t mistaken, there was a streak of gold underneath Atem’s eyes. It should be the tackiest outfit he’d ever seen and yet... Atem wore it well. As far as Seto was concerned, there might as well be no one in this room but him and Atem.

Perhaps.... perhaps it would be wise for him to leave. Everyone knew the history between him and Atem and their bitter rivalry. Or at least... everyone thought that they knew. They knew the Duel Monsters tournaments and how Atem always seemed to edge out a win from Seto. How Atem spent most of the duels smirking, flirting, and laughing. It was almost like Atem thought it was fun. Part of the thing that drove him the most crazy was Atem was best friends with Yugi Mutou of all people. Mutou, the head of the video game company that was rivals with Kaiba Corp. Even worse was that Atem had locked eyes with Seto and turned to Mutou to say something to him. If he didn’t know Mutou was dating Katsuya Jonouchi, he would easily have assumed that Mutou and Atem had a thing.

It was then that the room got uncomfortable as he realized that he was staring for just a little too long and forgotten that people in this room knew him too. He wondered vaguely if people would even realize that he’d been staring just a little too hard at Atem’s lips or the way he walked with such confidence. If he hadn’t been so focused on Atem and Mutou’s conversation, he would’ve seen Anzu coming. Anzu was yet another member of Atem’s crew and mostly known for originating the role of Black Magician Girl in a Broadway show he’d personally funded. If he’d known that Anzu would become an annoying thorn in his side, he would have never funded the project. Not only that, Anzu had an annoying habit of considering them friends and as such, she talked to him literally any time they met at boring events like this. Anzu had grabbed his bicep with a bright grin and teasingly said, “Come on! Atem and Yugi want to say hi to you!”

She didn’t even wait for an answer before dragging him forcefully over to them. Seto couldn’t help but panic. The first problem was that Atem was too hot to handle tonight. Didn’t he own a shirt? Seto knew he’d seen Atem in shirts before. Why did he not bother with a shirt tonight? It was freezing outside and Seto was concerned that Atem would catch a cold. Wait, no, stop that, he scolded himself. He didn’t care about Atem at all. So what if Atem caught a cold? It was his fault for dressing like that. “Mutou,” he said stiffly to Mutou, taking a moment to prepared himself before he turned to face Atem. Even a moment was not enough to prepare himself. He felt the wind knocked out of him as he came face to face with Atem. Atem’s upper lid had a perfect flick of black eyeliner, gold for his waterline and an intense gaze. Atem’s silver eyes was the worst place for him to look. “... Nasser. I see they let just anyone in now.”

Anzu hip checked him with a roll of her eyes before Jonouchi could say anything in response. “Seto, don’t be so rude,” she said with a light laugh before pointing a finger at Jonouchi with a glare, “That goes for you, Jou.” He figured it wasn’t worth telling her he wasn’t being rude when she got like that. Anzu had a funny way of absolutely ignoring his protests whenever he said he wasn’t rude and absolutely refused to take his side no matter how many times he insisted that he wasn’t being rude. “Besides, I was just thinking! This event is so boring and there’s literally only old people here so... we should all play a game!”

Mutou rolled his eyes at this. “Anzu, I thought we talked about this,” he said before Seto could protest himself. “We are absolutely not playing truth or dare at a charity gala.”

Atem had a glint in his eyes at the challenge and Seto couldn’t help but compare it to the glint he got whenever they dueled. Normally Seto would agree with Mutou here. Playing truth or dare at a gala like this would be stupid. They were here for one reason and it was because it made good PR sense to be seen at an event that benefited the arts. They were giving back. But the glint of challenge was there in Atem’s eyes and Seto had never once backed down from a challenge when Atem issued one. Even if the challenge went unspoken. “Scared, Mutou,” Seto said before he could help himself. “Got some secrets you’d like to keep?”

While normally Mutou wouldn’t be considered intimidating, there was something about his violet eyes turning fierce when challenged. He might be only five foot nine but he sure did manage to seem intimidating despite this glaring flaw. Not that Atem was much better. Seto wondered how his two most intense rivals were also the shortest guys he’d ever met. Even worse is how both of them seemed so much more relaxed at this event then should be legally allowed. The other thing was that Mutou didn’t seem to care about the people were that were here. Mutou’s hand was in Jonouchi’s openly without any concern what people might think. On top of that, Jonouchi was wearing the cheapest suit Seto had have ever seen. Mutou really didn’t seem to have much in the terms of standards. “Not all of us think the world is against us, Kaiba,” Mutou said and while his glare might’ve said he was angry, his words were said softer than Seto would’ve expected. “Fine, if you have no objections then I don’t see why we shouldn’t.”

It was at this point that Seto realized that perhaps he absolutely should have agreed with Mutou and avoided playing this game. He realized too late as he caught a glimpse of Atem’s stare that Atem must realize the opportunity that had fallen into his lap. “Excellent,” Anzu said as she motioned them towards a table and Seto sat down with the group he never thought he’d hang out with. “Let’s see... so the rules are simple. You pick either truth or dare, then you either answer the question or do the dare. You can reset once, no questions asked. However, if you try to reset again, you gotta take a drink. Makes sense, yeah?”

“Ah, classic college rules,” Jonouchi said with a grin, his arm loosely thrown around Yugi’s shoulder. Did they ever do anything apart, Seto wondered vaguely. Part of him was actually sort of jealous with how easy being open about their relationship came to Jonouchi and Mutou. Mutou never once seemed to care that people might judge him for his sexuality and deflected any rude comments with ease. Jonouchi, for his part, never had any shame to begin with. He supposed that was part of Jonouchi’s appeal to a mainstream audience. Though once again, he couldn’t help but privately think how Jonouchi and Mutou didn’t make sense as a couple. Perhaps he was a touch jealous of Mutou’s ease with himself. Neither Atem nor Mutou seemed to take themselves seriously. “I’m game. Granted, kinda hard to get smashed on champagne.”

“The point isn’t to get smashed,” Mutou protested as he grabbed a glass from the center of the table for himself. “The point is to get to know each other better.”

“Think I know you pretty well already, Yug,” Jonouchi teased as he slammed down one of the champagne flutes before grabbing two more and handing the second over to Atem. “Besides, ain’t fun if there isn’t a little bit of a risk of getting totally drunk off our asses at this boring party.”

Anzu grinned as she grabbed two champagne glasses, handing one to Seto. “Then it’s settled,” she said. “I think Seto should go first. Pick someone.”

This was a rare opportunity put into his lap. Seto could ask anything of either of his rivals, couldn’t he? Or dare them to do something stupid that would embarrass them. Either way, he knew he should seize this chance. Which is why he had no idea why he said, “Fine. Anzu. Truth or dare?”

Seto couldn’t exact read Anzu very well most times but he could’ve sworn she was glaring at him this time. In fact, he felt like it took her longer than usual before she finally spat out, “Truth.”

“Oh, you always pick truth,” Mutou complained, leaning back in his chair. “Are you never gonna live a little, Anzu?”

She glared at Mutou. “I live plenty, Yugi,” she said as she stretched in her chair. “Besides, we all know Seto could never come up with a dare interesting enough to do.”

“I resent that,” Seto objected, even though she might have had a point. He had no idea what he would’ve done if she’d picked dare. But he did have a question for her. “Why did you pick this dumb game for us to play, anyway?” She used her reset immediately, just a little quickly for Seto’s liking. However... the rules, he reminded himself. He couldn’t question her on why she’d reset. “Fine, I’ll ask something else. Why did you decide to become a dancer?”

“Ah,” she said with a light smile. “I’ve always liked dancing. It’s the one time where everything comes easy and natural to me. I don’t have to overthink it. It’s relaxing. In all honesty, I’d probably still be dancing even if I wasn’t getting paid to do so. Getting to do it for a living is just a bonus.”

Mutou seemed to be mulling over this. It suddenly occurred to Seto that he had no idea how Mutou felt about being the head of a video game company. All Seto really knew about Mutou is that he liked games in high school, was a champion in some video game tournaments, and that Mutou was dating Jonouchi. He didn’t even know what had led to Atem being friends with Mutou in the first place. Then again, Seto didn’t know a lot about the people at this table. “So doing something you love for a living hasn’t bred any resentment towards it,” Mutou asked. “Sorry, wait, it’s not my turn, is it?”

“No, it’s okay,” Anzu said, a shift in tone that Seto could not pin down. For a brief moment, Seto wondered if Anzu and Mutou had had this conversation before. “Sometimes it’s frustrating that there’s no line between doing something for fun and doing something for work. It can definitely feel a bit like I’m always on the clock but that’s where you guys come in. With you guys around, it feels like I can take a breather from being consumed by this one thing. Not only that, you guys kinda force me to focus on something else for a bit. Which helps keep it feeling like it’s consuming me.”

“I’m guessing this is straight from your ‘get new hobbies’ speech you gave Yugi last week,” Jonouchi asked with a light teasing grin before nudging Mutou. “See? I’m not the only one who thinks you should take more breaks from work.”

For a moment, Seto considered what Mutou’s friends were telling him. It was absolute insanity, as far as he was concerned. The idea of setting aside work for some inane hobbies was not just foreign to Seto – it was absolutely absurd. It almost reminded him of how Mokuba occasionally remarked that Seto should try working less. He’d almost always respond with “and let Mutou get the edge over me” and Mokuba would always roll his eyes in response. Surely this conversation must be staged, Seto reasoned. This had to be some sort of scheme on Mutou’s part to get Seto to lower his guard. Well, it won’t work. “Alright, it’s my turn,” Anzu declared, seeing to look a little more mischievous than usual. “Atem! Truth or dare?”

Atem glanced over at Seto briefly with a light smirk on his face. It bothered Seto how at ease Atem could look even in the most awkward of situations. “Easy. Dare, cause I’m not a lil bitch,” Atem said with a wink at Seto. Seto flushed furiously and wondered if someone had turned up the heater.

“Okay,” she said as she leaned forward as if she was sharing a secret with the table. “I dare you to kiss someone at this table.”

Seto swore the entire room fell silent. All he could hear was a buzzing sound in his ears. Unless Atem was willing to kiss someone who was taken, the only single person at this table was _him_. And the way Atem glanced over at Seto, it seemed Atem was aware of this fact himself. “Alright,” Atem said, getting up and moving in closer. He was much too close now. Seto could smell the body soap Atem must use mixed with... some sort of floral scent? The next thing Seto knew, Atem’s lips were pressed to his in the gentlest kiss. Seto didn’t know that a kiss could feel this nice. And when Atem parted, he wore a smirk on his face and Seto’s mind was fried. He vaguely wondered if this was a _joke_ on Atem’s part. Why didn’t he reset? “Right. My turn.”

Atem had returned to his seat and Seto felt the flush across his cheek as he realized he didn’t _want_ Atem to go back to his seat. He wanted Atem to get back here and kiss him again. He’d barely finished the thought when Atem’s bodyguard, Mahad, arrived at the table with a look of disapproval. “Young prince, I hope you aren’t getting yourself into trouble,” Mahad remarked as he wearily stared down Seto. Seto glared back. “You know your father would disapprove of these childish games.”

Seto was taken aback when Atem merely pulled a champagne glass from the center of the table and passed it to Mahad. “Ah, don’t be such a bummer,” Atem said cheerfully, encouraging Mahad to sit next to him. Mahad rolled his eyes as he sat down next Atem. “It’s not like dad cares to check social media much, anyway. Take a load off, play truth or dare with us. Promise dad won’t find out.”

Mahad sighed as he took the glass of champagne. “I better not have to carry your ass out of here, young prince,” Mahad warned. “Whose turn is it? Please tell me it’s not –“

“Mine,” Atem said gleefully as Mahad muttered off an ‘of course’ under his breath. “So, Mahad. Truth or dare?”

“Of course,” Mahad said but this time he was smiling. “Truth, young prince.”

“You’re always so boring,” Atem teased and Seto felt a surge of a strange urge to punch Mahad in the face. He knew it was absolutely irrational – Mahad absolutely could take Seto in a fight. Mahad was one of the few people taller than Seto and not only that, it was clear Mahad was strong. Still, Seto felt a deep seated hatred for Mahad out of nowhere. It passed as suddenly as it happened. “Alright, tell the truth: do you think I’m cool?”

To this, Mahad laughed. “Is that really the best you’ve got, young prince,” Mahad asked and Seto felt like a knife was twisting in his stomach for some odd reason. Mahad spoke fondly towards Atem and it made Seto’s hands clench. “Of course you’re cool. You’re the coolest guy I know. Right, does this mean it’s my turn now?”

“Yeah,” Mutou said. “So far Anzu, Atem, and Seto have all gone. So...”

Seto could barely pay attention the game anymore. He wasn’t sure how long it was until Atem excused himself from the table and Seto seized his chance. He got up shortly after Atem, excusing himself under the guise of needing to take a phone call. He followed Atem straight into the bathroom, where Atem was finishing up... going to the bathroom? Oh. Seto was determined to not look below Atem’s waist. He would not look below Atem’s waist. He didn’t need to. “What the fuck was kissing me about?”

Atem seemed startled and quickly zipped up his pants. He turned to glare at Seto before heading over to the sinks. “Anzu dared me to kiss someone at the table,” he replied as he eyed Seto in the mirror. Seto was slightly grateful for the distance the mirror provided as Atem’s dark eyes were intoxicating. “You’re single and cute and I thought why not.”

“That’s it?”

Atem shrugged. “Yeah, that’s it,” he said simply. “Why do you care?”

To this, Seto had no real answer at first. He didn’t even know if he did care, really. It was just... now he was staring at Atem’s lips. He caught himself quick enough, looking away from Atem. Suddenly there was too much pressure in this bathroom. Much like the main room, it was rather dim too. Just barely enough light to make out that Atem was still so golden. Everything about Atem was golden and that drove him crazy. He was the golden boy in the press no matter what he did. If Seto didn’t know better, he would think that Atem didn’t take anything seriously. Didn’t he? Seto had seen him during their many duels and not once did Atem seem to really care if he won or lost. “Do you even care,” Seto found himself asking without thinking about it.

Atem froze and the sound of water running was all that filled the room. Well, that wasn’t true. Seto could hear the music from the charity gala barely permeating the room and laughter from the dance floor. But none of that mattered. He had to know what Atem’s real goal had been in kissing him. It had to be to trip him up somehow, right? A calculated effort. It couldn’t be as simple as Atem was claiming. “Of course I care,” Atem said, frowning as he finished washing his hands and reached for a paper towel. “Kaiba, what was your reason for following me into the bathroom? Just to ask why I kissed you? Cause if you have an issue with it...”

“I don’t have an issue with it,” Seto said quickly. “Well... no, I definitely have an issue with you trying to trip me up. I don’t know what -”

He had the audacity to laugh. A loud, rambunctious laugh that made Seto feel small. How could one 5’6” man make him feel so goddamn intimidated? How did it feel like he filled the room despite everything working against him? Atem, of all people, should not have the capacity to make Seto feel small. “You thought I was...,” he trailed off, laughing still before shaking his head. “Do you really think that I need an edge over you competitively? What’s the track record again? Let’s see... oh yeah. I’ve won at least twenty times and you still have yet to get a win over me. I don’t need to trip you up to win, Kaiba.”

“Then what was that kiss about, Nasser? You really think that I’m going to believe that you just kissed me because... you think I’m... cute?” Seto eyed Atem. There was no way a man like that would look at Seto and pick him of all people. Atem might not be tall but he really didn’t need it. Between that sharply defined jawline, the intoxicating dark eyes that dare one to trip into the void, and that golden skin, there was nothing about Atem that wasn’t attractive. What did Seto have going for him? Height. That was about it. And even that worked against him since he often felt like a deer first learning to walk. “I’m not stupid, Nasser.”

“Sure seems like it,” Atem shot back. What was it that was in Atem’s eyes? He suddenly turned to face Seto, his hands gripping at the counter. And then Seto suddenly realized what it was: he’d seen it in Atem’s face when they were dueling. It was a challenge. The spark of a challenge that Seto had no answer for. He didn’t know what Atem was challenging him to and yet... he badly wanted to agree to the challenge. “You’re having a freak out over a kiss. Don’t tell me you’ve never been kissed before.”

Seto flushed instantly. Of course he’d been kissed before. Except... he’d never been kissed by a guy before. Turns out being kissed by a guy felt different than being kissed by a girl. It felt... right. But he wasn’t about to admit that in a dingey bathroom of all places. Atem was moving in closer, a brow raised. It was a challenge and Seto, for once, had no road map of how this should go. His heart leapt into his throat as he spat out, “Of course I’ve been kissed before, Nasser. The real question is have you ever kissed before? That was a garbage kiss.”

“Oh,” Atem said as he was much too close again and Seto’s back was pressed against the door. The click of the lock hit Seto’s ears as Atem’s hand reached to grip at his collar. “Then let me try again.”

Atem pulled Seto down towards him and Seto felt flushed all over as Atem’s lips easily parted his own. For once, he understood what it meant to feel sparks when one was kissed. It felt like an electric current was running through him and all he could focus on was how intense Atem was. He was getting caught up in the moment that he’d forgotten about the party just on the other side of the door. All the mattered was Atem and all that mattered was that Atem kept _kissing_ him. He was surprised, however, as Atem shoved off Seto’s jacket. “Wait,” Seto said, pulling away out of breath. “What are you doing?”

“Kissing you,” Atem said as he pressed a quick kiss to Seto’s jaw and Seto’s mind was filled with static. “And taking your clothes off. What do you think I’m doing?”

Taking... Seto needed a minute to process that as Atem tossed Seto’s jacket aside, undoing the buttons on his shirt. “This is... this is a little quick,” Seto stammered, not wanting to admit that he’s never done _this_ before. To his great relief, Atem stopped undoing his shirt but unfortunately he also stopped kissing his neck. “I mean... I don’t want to stop kissing. I... I don’t think I want to stop doing that.”

“Alright,” Atem said with a slight smirk as his hips pressed up against Seto’s and Atem pressed another kiss to Seto’s lips. “Whatever makes you feel comfortable.”

Whatever made him feel comfortable? That thought buzzed in his head. Was he even comfortable now? Part of him wished he was drunker. Then he could write this all off as something he’d done just because he had a few drinks. Except he wasn’t. The only thing that was causing him to feel this featherlight was Atem kissing him. Atem’s hands in his hair. Atem pressing his entire body against his. He could feel exactly how toned Atem was. He’d know Atem was athletic but it never clicked how it would shape Atem’s physique. Seto couldn’t help himself as his hands went under Atem’s jacket and suddenly he was so grateful that Atem had foregone a shirt. He got to feel Atem’s abs and his hands slipped behind to feel Atem’s firm back muscles rippling under his skin. Seto would almost describe it as sinful if he still was Catholic.

In fact, at this point, Seto knew everything he was told when he was Catholic had to be wrong. He could almost believe Atem himself was a god and Seto would be damned if he didn’t worship him. Seto’s knees buckled at the thought as Atem’s mouth was at his neck. Suddenly he just wanted Atem’s clothes off and he started pulling Atem’s jacket off. “Mhm, so I can’t take your clothes off but you can take mine off,” Atem hummed as his hands grabbed at Seto’s ass and Seto jumped slightly at the feeling as Atem nuzzled into his neck. Seto soothed himself by focusing on just how strong Atem’s were and wondered vaguely if Atem could lift him up. “Now that just doesn’t seem fair to me...”

“Seems perfectly fair to me,” Seto retorted. “Besides... you’re the one who came here not wearing a shirt. Any reason for that?”

“Cause I’m sexy,” Atem replied with a grin and Seto almost hated him for it. Almost. The worst part of his simple statement is that he was right. Seto couldn’t possibly argue in any way that Atem was not an attractive man. “Gonna disagree with me?”

“Absolutely not,” Seto admitted just a little too quickly and he flushed as he realized how quickly he’d said that. Though he supposed at this point, there was little room for shame. “So you can see why I’d like for _your_ clothes to be off.”

“But you won’t do the same,” Atem asked with a raised brow.

“I don’t see what that has to do with it.”

Atem chuckled and shook his head. “You’re something else, Kaiba,” he said as he pulled away to shrug his jacket full off and carefully set it aside on the sink counter near them. “But if you’d liked me undressed,” he said as he carefully kicked off his shoes and started undoing his belt, “then I’m more than willing to indulge you.”

The more clothes Atem stripped away, the more Seto lost the ability to focus on anything else. The fact is that Atem was clearly well built from hiking and soccer and whatever else Atem happened to do outside of playing card games with him. And the next thing Seto knew, he was falling to his knees right in front of Atem. He hands ghosted along Atem’s hips as he wondered what it would feel like to just take Atem right into his mouth. He wondered if it would feel like heaven. Atem’s hands went straight into Seto’s hair. All he could focus on in this moment was Atem specifically that he barely noticed Atem’s gold body glitter had rubbed off on his suit during their heated make out. And he barely noticed that they’d been absent from the party for quite a while now.

Everything just seemed to fall right into place, really. This is where he was supposed to be – here, with Atem, with no one else around. In fact, Seto barely could remember the party at all. His mouth connected with Atem’s skin and Atem let out a gentle moan in response. Something stirred in Seto’s gut and all he wanted now was to hear more of that moan. Taste more of Atem’s skin. It felt like he was born again, really.


	2. all eyes on me, your illusionist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> met you in a bar.... all eyes on me your illusionist, all eyes on us. i make all your gray days clear and... wear you like a necklace...

Ever since that night at the gala, Seto found himself unable to stay away from Atem for a whole new reason outside of playing a card game with him. He craved when Atem would message him now because it almost always meant that Seto was in for a good time. No, they still hadn’t gone much further than they had at the gala, even months later. Seto just could not bring himself to get undressed in front of Atem. He’d rather explain to Mokuba exactly where the gold glitter on all his clothes was coming from than ever let Atem fully undress him. However, it was starting to get harder to ignore how badly he wanted Atem. And part of that meant submitting to the idea that Atem might actually see him naked. It was a war in his head, really.

On the one hand, it was nice enough to simply just go as far as they had that first night. Certainly it could be nicer to actually go all the way but... did they really need to? As far as Seto was concerned, they had a nice enough thing going. Not only that, he didn’t want to look Atem in the eyes and admit he’d never had sex before. Atem, as far as Seto could tell, was definitely very experienced. Sometimes Seto wondered just who Atem’s first time was with. It started as an idle wonder, really. And then it started consuming him, leaving him wondering if Atem thought of this as something serious or if it was just something fun for him. He secretly hoped that Atem’s heart was skipping when Seto left each time, hoping that Atem thought about him when he wasn’t around. However, without proof, Seto was faced with the idea that Atem might not actually care about him like that.

It felt so simple when it was just the two of them alone and sometimes Seto allowed himself to believe that Atem might actually want this to be serious. He allowed himself to believe that he was a bright spot in Atem’s day. But Seto was not a person of faith and he did not see any reason to rely on it. And just like every other time, it started with Seto’s phone buzzing in the middle of the night with a text from Atem that was a simple “where you at?” Knowing Atem, he was at some crappy dive bar that Seto wouldn’t normally be caught dead at. But when Atem texted him that, a rush surged through him. He kept thinking that maybe today would be the day he’d let Atem go that far. Today would be the day, Seto always thought. And then every time he chickened out. Despite this, he texted back that he was on his way even though he ignored Atem yesterday on his birthday. He almost felt like he owed Atem something but he wasn’t sure what. Atem didn’t seem too caught up on Seto skipping his birthday, however. It seemed like it was just part of the game to Atem.

“You can meet me in the back,” the text Atem sent back read. Seto flushed. Atem seemed aware that, for whatever reason, Seto wasn’t comfortable with being open with... whatever this was. Seto hesitated on the word ‘relationship’ because that really wasn’t the best way to describe this. A relationship implied there was a bit more beyond a rivalry and occasionally making out in dirty bathrooms at various dive bars all over town complete with occasionally Seto going down on Atem. Seto thought long and hard about what this hooking up situation was and came up empty each time. It was hard enough to feel comfortable in the car knowing exactly where he was heading and what he planned on doing without thinking too hard about the fact he was wearing _jeans_ of all things. It helped to keep people from fully recognizing him, though. They’d glance at him and do a double take before shaking it off each time because of course that couldn’t possible be Seto Kaiba. Seto Kaiba wouldn’t be spotted dead wearing jeans, after all.

This, of course, made it the perfect way to slip around various dive in bars with Atem without being noticed. As far as Atem... he wasn’t sure how Atem got away with not being noticed hooking up with someone at a bar. He came to the natural conclusion that for Atem, hooking up with someone at a bar was so common of an occurrence that it wasn’t worth noticing for anyone. This conclusion always caused a weird feeling in his gut, like someone was squeezing his stomach. Since the thought made him feel nauseous, of course he fixated on it, wondering who else Atem had hooked up with. He spent so long thinking about it that he barely realized when they’d already arrived at the dive bar that Atem had said he was at. Of course Seto entered through the back, not exactly wanting to risk being seen entering a dump like this.

He wasn’t sure why Atem liked places like this. As far as he could tell, Mahad nor the rest of Atem’s friend group accompanied him to these places. Even Anzu didn’t seem to care for places like this which surprised Seto to find out Anzu had standards for where she hung out. This almost always meant it was just Seto and Atem. Each time, Atem would buy them both drinks despite Seto’s protest that he could handle it. Of course, Atem always pointed out that he thought Seto wanted to keep a low profile. Which was true. Handing out his credit card at a place like this would leave a paper trail and Seto hated carrying paper money on him. Still, it bothered him when Atem paid for things. Shouldn’t that be his job? Actually, Seto wasn’t sure what the conventions were here. “Relax,” Atem said as he passed Seto a whiskey on the rocks. “No one’s looking our way.”

Seto hadn’t even realized he was looking around to see if anyone had recognized them until Atem pointed it out. Once again, Atem proved how much more relaxed he was in situations like this. Seto took a massive swig of his drink with a grimace. “You always act like you know exactly what’s going on,” Seto remarked as Atem’s arm looped around his waist. “It’s a very annoying trait.”

“If I’m so annoying, then why do you come to see me every time I ask,” Atem teased before moving to press a quick kiss to Seto’s neck. Seto would complain about the boldness except... Atem was right. No one seemed to even look their way. It was like being a completely normal person for once. “Can’t just be because you like sucking my dick.”

Crimson stained Seto’s cheek as he hissed “Nasser” and Atem laughed. Of course he laughed. The one thing Atem could be counted on was to act like nothing meant anything. This meant that Seto was still trying to figure out exactly what Atem’s plan was here. Even though so far, Atem had no obvious plan. “You truly are the worst.”

He was certain that Atem had never seen him this relaxed before and that certainly was saying something considering how Seto still wasn’t fully relaxed. Every single time, he was nervous that today was the day their little secret rendezvouses would be revealed to the press. The fear of being caught send a thrill down Seto’s spine even though he was certainly the reality would not turn him nearly as much. Part of him _liked_ the idea of being caught with his mouth around Atem’s cock and part of him feared it. Atem, for his part, did not seemed all too concerned with people recognizing them. He was so much bolder than Seto. Not only that, it wouldn’t be the first time Atem was caught hooking up with someone, Seto noted bitterly. Atem’s hook ups used to be the center of gossip until people got bored of discussing some random dude Atem was hooking up and moved on with their lives.

Seto almost envied the fact that Atem was so wild that no one cared when he was a little bit sexual. It meant that Atem was free from judgement when he wanted to hook up. Meanwhile, Seto had repressed himself so thoroughly that he still couldn’t bring himself to even let Atem take off his shirt. This led to a new fear that Seto had growing deep in the pit of his stomach: that Atem would get bored of the chase and cut his losses. Seto had never known Atem to back down from a challenge but then again... perhaps Atem didn’t see this as a challenge. He had no way of knowing exactly what Atem was thinking. All he knew is that Atem sometimes openly, brazenly kissed him right in the middle of the bar without care to who could see them. All that he knew is that Atem would ask him to meet him in places like this and that Atem was willing to take his take his time.

This led to a new wonder: did Atem view Seto as a prey? Was Atem seeking this from Seto to go on and brag about? Still, when Atem’s lips to pressed to his, Seto couldn’t help but think maybe he was overthinking everything. What harm could it do to let Atem take him home? Hell, they didn’t even have to go home, as Seto had learned from experience. They could take up one of the single stall bathrooms and have a little bit of fun. Atem dragging him onto the dance floor specifically to grind on him didn’t help Seto’s brain think clearly. In fact, Seto was fairly certain the more Atem did, the less Seto thought.

He’d make a correlation chart if his brain didn’t feel so fried from the minute Atem’s hips were pressed up against his ass. He wanted so badly to give in, so badly to just let Atem have his way. But then he reminded himself that Atem looked like _that_ and he looked like _this_ and it just didn’t make sense for Atem to want to stick around with someone who looked like _this_. It didn’t compute. Atem was just so much more attractive than Seto ever deserved and ergo, Seto should be happy to just settle for what they had now. Not only that... could he look Atem in the eyes at the next tournament if he’d let Atem take his virginity in a dingey dive bar bathroom? Of course not. Ergo, he made sure to focus more on how Atem kissing him felt.

Which, honestly, was a very bad idea because of course he wound up semi drunk in a dive bar bathroom again with Atem’s mouth against his neck. Once again, Atem was attempting to take his shirt off and once again, Seto placed his hands over Atem’s, shaking his head. Once again, Seto feared that Atem was getting bored of him but did not say anything about it. The one thing about Atem that Seto consistently liked was his silver tongue, able to pluck out exactly what Seto needed or wanted to hear and say it. He almost believed Atem when Atem said that he did this because he liked “hanging out” with Seto. In fact, Atem seemed to like a lot of things. Seto hadn’t really heard Atem talk about anything he disliked over the past few months. That annoyed Seto slightly.

It was like Atem was made out of pure sunshine distilled into human form. Between his penchant for gold and his warm smile, Atem was impossible to look away from. Even his most dressed down looks were designed to say “look at me, look at me” as much as possible, accentuating all the good parts of his physique. It was safe for Seto to assume that Atem not only knew he was hot, he knew the effect he had on other people as well. He wore confidence with ease and he always took the lead when it came to their little make out sessions. Every time, Seto would find himself pressed against the wall as Atem kissed him and every time, Seto would find himself desperately aching for more than just a kiss. At this point, he was certain that Atem had him right around his little finger. Like it had always been inevitable that Seto would be Atem’s specifically.

It was easy to get caught up in the moment when Atem was just _so good_ at this. Atem’s hands were so sure, so certain when he pressed up against Seto and grabbed at Seto’s ass. His confidence transferred directly to _this_ and he seemed well aware of his effect. He seemed well aware that every time he kissed Seto, Seto completely melted in his hands. He even seemed aware that Seto would not do this with anyone else but Atem. If it were anyone else, Seto would’ve put a stop to it ages ago. However... how could he not with Atem? Atem, who was so sure, so confident, so warm that Seto desperately craved his affection. “Still think I’m the worst,” Atem asked breathlessly against Seto’s neck.

“Fuck you,” Seto said before he could stop himself. As much as he liked this, he couldn’t help himself when Atem teased him like that. And yet Atem knew that meant “kiss me again” as he pressed his lips to Seto’s again. It seemed like Atem had his number and it would bother Seto with anyone else except... he already knew Atem could read him with ease. Why else would he constantly have that edge over him when they played games together? Atem always knew exactly what Seto was planning and setting up and always was ready to counter. _It transferred neatly_ , Seto thought dazed. No matter what Seto said, Atem seemed well aware of what Seto meant.

It would be frustrating if it wasn’t so useful. Seto hated talking about his feelings and Atem never once pressed him for what he was feeling. The main reason Seto hated talking about his feelings is because he was never sure what he was feeling. He knew that he hated seeing Mahad hanging around Atem despite knowing he was there for Atem’s safety. He hated knowing that Mutou and Atem were close friends. He knew that it drove him wild thinking about what Atem was up to when he wasn’t around. But god, was everything just so simple when they were alone together. Everything fell right into place when Atem was pressed to him like this, when Atem was holding him like this, when Atem started leaving marks right on Seto’s neck like that.

And normally Seto would be embarrassed to be openly claimed like that, but it was Atem. Of course he was Atem’s. It was foolish of him to pretend otherwise. It was why he finally made the bold move of whispering in Atem’s ear, “Let’s get out of here.”

The next thing Seto knew, they were in his car heading back to his home. Atem was absolutely shameless, Seto discovered rather quickly. Atem didn’t bother to hide what he wanted to do with Seto as he kept Seto close to him and kept pressing kisses up along Seto’s neck and jawline. Seto had stiffened slightly from this overt affection in front of people on his payroll. He wondered if Atem did this frequently yet again. Had he done _this_ recently? “Relax,” Atem breathed against Seto’s neck. “You’re always so tense. Let me help you relax.”

The offer was tempting, even more tempting now that they weren’t in a dingey dive bar bathroom anymore. Yet Seto couldn’t bring himself to relax. “Not in front of my driver,” Seto half scolded, well aware that was a ridiculous line to make when he was allowing Atem to press his tongue right into his mouth in front of his driver. “Just... can we take this... slow?”

“Whatever you want,” Atem said with a light smirk as he pressed another quick kiss to Seto’s lips. “I’ve wanted you for quite some time now, Kaiba.”

Those words sent a thrill down Seto’s spine. How long was “a while”? Seto didn’t dare ask. He allowed himself to have wild fantasies that Atem had wanted him from their very first duel. He’d gone up against tough opponents before but only Atem seemed to offer any real substance to his challenge. Atem challenged him to think outside the box and to consider the way he thought. Atem offered up creative victories that Seto would’ve never considered possible. Was it any wonder Seto had been obsessed with dueling him for so long? And now Atem had offered up something entirely new for Seto to obsess over.

In fact, Seto was completely obsessed with this new question. It stuck to the back of his mind the entire drive back to his home. It played in a loop as they stumbled half-drunk out of the car and up the stairs to his room. How long was a while? Was this a game to Atem too? Was Seto handing victory over to Atem by allowing this to happen? Did he even care if he lost whatever little game Atem was playing with him? To these questions, Seto had no answers. In fact, for the first time, Seto did not care if Atem won over him. He didn’t even care if he never won against Atem. “Don’t be in too much of a rush there, Nasser.”

“Who’s rushing,” Atem asked with a rather playful tone as he tossed his shirt aside, pushing Seto back towards his own bed. “It’s not like we’ve been screwing around for months or anything.”

The words “screwing around” halted Seto’s certainty in what he was doing. _Screwing around_. Was that all this was? Screwing around? Suddenly all appeal in letting Atem go all the way him was lost. He shoved Atem off him, shaking his head. “Get out of my house,” Seto said curtly. “If that’s all this is to you, then I don’t want any part of it.”

Atem seemed confused by this, head tilting. “You didn’t have any issue with it before tonight,” Atem said, still going to pick up his shirt. “Should we talk about this?”

“No,” Seto said curtly. Had he been this foolish? He’d allowed Atem to toy with him for this long. He wouldn’t allow Atem to toy with him further. “I don’t need you.”

Atem frowned. “I never thought you needed me,” he said as he pulled his shirt back on and Seto almost regretted kicking him out now. He reminded himself that this was the better move. He couldn’t just allow himself to get this attached to his rival, after all. He wasn’t sure how Atem managed to seduced him into thinking otherwise. “Kaiba... are you sure there’s nothing you want to talk about?”

Seto glared at Atem. “What’s there to talk about?”

He should’ve known better because of course Atem was looking for exactly that kind of opening. “How we both feel about this arrangement, for example,” Atem said, rather quickly. Atem was, of course, well aware that Seto would try to rush him out and Atem just needed to find out what was wrong. For his own sanity. “I mean, I know I’m enjoying myself but... it just... you never seem to want to get any closer than where we were months back. I don’t understand what’s keeping you back.”

“Feelings,” Seto asked, incredulous that Atem would even attempted to breach such a delicate subject in such a clumsy manner. “You want to talk about _feelings_? After you said this was just screwing around? Are you fucking kidding me? You made your ‘feelings’ quite clear there.”

“That’s what you’re so upset about,” Atem asked, daring to look surprised. Seto didn’t understand how Atem couldn’t grasp how insensitive what he said was. In fact, he was surprised Atem still wasn’t just leaving his house after Seto had told him several times to get out. Normally, he would have called security and had Atem forcibly removed. However... Seto didn’t _want_ to forcibly remove Atem from the property. It was like there was something stopping him from giving up completely on this night. “Kaiba, I was... neither of us had really talked about what this is. I just assumed it would be safer to say we were fucking around than risk saying anything that might... might throw this off, you know?”

That certainly confused Seto. What did Atem mean by ‘throw this off’? Seto mulled over it because no, he didn’t know what Atem meant. In fact, Seto was even less certain of what he’d been doing with Atem even more than before. Finally, he decided he was just forced to concede defeat. “No,” Seto admitted quietly, “I don’t know. Can you please explain it to me?”

Atem seemed taken aback. “You mean you don’t know what I mean by that,” Atem asked quietly. “Don’t you get it, Kaiba? Don’t... don’t tell me you don’t get why Anzu set up that truth or dare game all those months ago. Like... it was fucking obvious, wasn’t it?”

“No.”

That was the wrong to say because now Atem looked mad. “You... you don’t get it?” Atem seemed almost frustrated and Seto stepped back, almost nervous now. What could Atem of all people have to be nervous about? Seto was almost annoyed by the faux humility routine. “Kaiba, Anzu did that because she knew I.... I... fuck. Whatever. It’s stupid, anyway.”

 _Anticlimactic_ , Seto thought. Seto was annoyed that whatever was going on in Atem’s head, he was keeping to himself. Atem just didn’t want to seem to want to come forward with any information Seto might not already have. “No, don’t just fuckin pussy out like that,” Seto said in annoyance. “Come on. Tell me.”

“She did it because she knew I had a crush on you, okay,” Atem said, half growling it and Seto’s mind completely broke. Had? As in past tense? As if reading his mind, Atem snapped, “Still. Have. Whatever. The point is, I like you, Seto. Have liked you. Do like you. Whatever you need to stop fuckin overthinking and understand that... this has been happening because I like you. Not for whatever weird, nefarious reason you’ve cooked up for me in your head.”

This was even harder for Seto to accept but what he was really fixated on was how _good_ his name sounded in Atem’s voice. Seto racked his brain to figure out if he’d ever heard Atem say his name like that before and came up empty. This was the first time that Atem ever used his first name like that. And Seto couldn’t help himself. “Atem,” he breathed, unable to contain himself. “I...” He wanted to say he liked him too. He wanted to ask Atem to kiss him. He wanted to do a lot of things but instead he said, “Can I believe you?”

Atem looked surprised by this. “If you don’t believe me, then what are we doing here?”

It seemed like Atem always knew the exact words to make Seto stop right in his tracks. What _are_ they doing here? What kept dragging Seto back to Atem? What made Atem so desirable to him that he couldn’t help but go every time Atem called? Even now, when he told Atem to leave... he didn’t really mean it. He didn’t want Atem to leave. He wanted Atem to stay here and fight for him. The thought hit him like a lightening bolt. It was the secret that he’d been holding close to his chest, hidden from even himself, and now that he was forced to step away... he saw plainly what he had been doing. It was a game he’d been playing in which he hoped Atem would just fight for him. “I...” Seto was utterly disarmed, with no real recourse. Atem had him cornered. “I... I just thought you were playing with me.”

“Never,” Atem said softly, stepping forward again and Seto couldn’t help himself. He was drawn in. “I assure you, Seto,” he said softly as he cupped his cheek. Seto’s hand went over Atem’s and he admired how soft his hands felt despite the fact that he knew Atem was anything but soft. “I honest to god like you. I like you so much that I just want to kiss you again and again. I’ve been so nervous that there would be a day that you’d realize I have nothing really to offer you and you’d just... ditch me.”

To this, Seto couldn’t help but laugh. Atem? Offer nothing? “That’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said, Nasser,” Seto said, unable to help himself. “Look at yourself. You’re... you offer a lot.” _A lot more than I do_ , Seto thought as he stared Atem down. It slowly dawned on Seto that Atem was _not_ joking. Atem looked pensive and shook his head. “Don’t you tell me _no_ , Nasser. You’re far better than I am.”

Atem frowned as his thumb ran over Seto’s cheek and Seto leaned forward. “So let’s review,” Atem said slowly and Seto took the time just admire the way Atem spoke. He was always soft spoken to a certain degree and his louder voice was typically reserved for theatrical purposes. As far as Seto could tell, Atem had always been soft spoken with him when they were alone like this. As far as he could tell, there had to be some meaning behind why Atem chose to speak Japanese with him exclusively. Seto and him both knew other languages. Atem could’ve spoken to him in English, in Cantonese, in French... and yet Atem chose Seto’s native language. There had to be meaning in that. “This entire time I was anxious you were going to ditch me; you were anxious that I was just messing with you. The entire time I thought you were too good for me; you were thinking the same thing. I’m starting to see an issue here.”

“And what issue is that?”

“That we’re both idiots,” Atem said simply, closing the gap between them to kiss Seto again. This time, Seto allowed himself to enjoy it and relish that Atem _wanted_ to kiss _him_. He allowed himself to enjoy the moment, rather than immediately shove Atem away. He couldn’t help but be annoyed when Atem pulled away. “How about we agree that this is us acting on the fact that we like each other? Does that work for you?”

Seto nodded and Atem kissed him again. Resumed kissing him, is more accurate. Atem’s tongue ghosted along Seto’s lips and Seto parted them for him with a moan. His entire brain was running on a new high: knowing Atem _liked_ him. Atem was doing this because he _liked_ him! He was fixating on it as Atem undid his shirt and for once, Seto didn’t object. Seto allowed Atem to go further as Atem’s hips pressed into his. Once again, his back hit the mattress as Atem kissed at Seto’s neck. Seto’s pulse quickened as Atem started to undo his pants. Up until now, Seto never bothered imagining what it’d be like to do _this_. It wasn’t that he was one hundred percent disinterested – the mechanics of it fascinated him well enough. It just... no one appealed to him like Atem did.

Atem was just amazing and wonderful and Seto figured if he was going to try _this_ with anyone, it might as well be Atem. Seto groaned as Atem pressed soft kisses to his neck, occasionally biting. As far as Seto could tell, Atem was even _smirking_ against his skin. “Mhm, do you ever stop smirking,” Seto asked before he could help himself.

“I only smirk when I’ve got you trapped right where I want you,” Atem teased as he pushed apart Seto’s legs. “And you, my dear friend, are exactly right where I want you.”

 _Now what on earth could he mean by that_ , Seto thought absently as Atem pressed another kiss to his lips. He liked how Atem said “my dear friend” and fixated on that. He wondered if he could get Atem to say it again without actually asking him for it. There were a lot of things he wanted Atem to do without actually asking for it, really. Somehow, Atem knew that Seto wanted him to take his shirt back off. Atem knew to kiss Seto right below his jaw while his hands went straight to Seto’s hips. He knew to press his hips right between Seto’s spread open legs. God, did Atem know what to do. Atem knew all the places to touch that left Seto feeling like he was on fire.

And when Atem’s hands went right to Seto’s ass, Seto flushed bright red and attempted to hide his face behind his hands. One of Atem’s hands moved to pin his wrist above his head and Seto got a full view of Atem’s gaze on him: intense. Too intense for Seto to handle. He looked away from Atem’s eyes as Atem pressed a finger into him. “Look at me,” Atem urged as Seto felt flushed all over. “Please, look at me.” Seto shook his head before Atem moved to recapture Seto’s lips in a pressing kiss. It made Seto’s head dizzy. And yet, Atem was so gentle that he couldn’t help himself. He finally looked back at Atem as Atem managed to press in a second finger, causing Seto to gasp. “You look so good like this.”

Did he? Seto almost purred at the idea that Atem found _him_ attractive. Atem, who looked like a god made human, found _him_ attractive. With where Atem’s fingers were, it was hard for Seto to deny the truth in Atem’s words. Especially when Atem was looking at him like _that_ – with such an intense gaze that Seto could melt. “You’re beautiful,” Seto breathed, unable to help himself. “I’ve always thought so.”

“Glad to hear it,” Atem said with a smirk and Seto couldn’t bring himself to hate that smirk anymore. The true honest reaction he had was to roll his hips up towards Atem’s hand, moaning desperately for more. He knew that Atem had him right where he wanted him and Seto didn’t _care_. This was exactly where he wanted to be too. _Maybe we could both win,_ Seto thought, almost dazed by the thought. The thought sent a shock down his spine and he’d barely noticed that Atem had managed to get a third finger in. “I know I’ve always wanted to get you like this,” Atem whispered as his paced begun to pick up. “You look so good with your legs spread like this...”

Seto blushed and wondered if he should’ve played into Atem’s hands ages ago. Clearly playing into Atem’s hands led him to exactly where he wanted to be. Could he even be described as trapped when Atem’s hands were still lose enough to where he could leave if he wanted to? He almost wished Atem would be rougher but at the same time... there was something about each soft, satin like brush of the lips to his neck, to his collarbone, to his jaw... to his lips. Every single place Atem touched felt like it had be burned and yet Seto craved more of it despite all logic suggesting otherwise. Seto thought he’d want to recoil from this but instead he was leaning in to it.

He wasn’t even certain how long they laid like this, with Atem’s gentle touch with a soft rhythm and Atem alternating his kisses between Seto’s neck and mouth. He just knew that he never wanted it to stop. Which made it all the more unfortunate when Atem’s hand pulled away. Before Seto could protest, Atem was aligning himself with Seto’s entrance and then... _oh_. Seto moaned out Atem’s name without even thinking and Atem smirked against Seto’s skin yet again. They were past the point of words, really. So for the next few hours, Seto let himself get lost in Atem.


	3. all eyes on us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cause we break down a little... and when you get me alone it's so simple... we can feel it

Seto had known Anzu wanted to direct for a while and he always told her to come to him when she had a script she wanted to adapt. He’d never thought he’d actually see her arrive, script in hand with a determined look on her face. She slammed the script down on his desk, taking the seat opposite of him and crossing her legs. “This is the play I want to do,” she said, not bothering to wait for him to say anything. “Thought you might like it too.”

Curious, Seto opened the script and as he read through, he made one quick discovery: this was a romantic comedy. Anzu knew for a fact Seto was not a fan of romantic comedies so he wasn’t sure why she’d thought he’d like this one. Until he realized something about the love interest: it reminded him heavily of Atem. A blush crossed his face as it slowly dawned on him exactly why she thought Seto might like this script. “I don’t like romantic comedies,” Seto half snapped, meaner than he intended. Anzu surprisingly snickered at this. “But if this... garbage... is what you want to do, I suppose I can’t stop you.”

Anzu had a smirk on her face and Seto couldn’t tell what for. “Is it really garbage,” Anzu challenged. “I thought you’d really take a shine to the love interest. You know. Son of a politician, sort of laid back with a summer birthday... I mean, it is called _Card Sharks_ , after all. Thought you might appreciate it for that reason.”

Seto glared at Anzu. He knew exactly what she was getting at. “When did you want to open this?”

“I was thinking mid to late March,” she said carefully. “I think six months should be enough to reserve a relatively decent sized theatre, contact a set designer, and start the process for auditions. I know it’ll give plenty of room for a soft opening and any... incidents that might happen.” He gave a curt nod, ready to return back to work but... Anzu didn’t move. “By the way, Seto... happy birthday!”

He stiffened. “Who told you it’s my birthday?”

“Mokie did,” Anzu said, a look of triumph on her face. “So. Why are you working and not with Atem? Don’t tell me things didn’t work out between you two.”

“Nothing is going on between me and Atem,” Seto snapped, looking flustered. “Besides, Atem doesn’t even know when my birthday is and he’s not going to know. You are going to keep this information strictly between us.”

“Oh come on,” Anzu said, annoyingly chipper. “I’m sure Atem would love to celebrate your birthday with you! He was actually really disappointed you didn’t come out to his birthday so you kind of owe him this.”

Atem was disappointed he wasn’t there on his birthday? Seto wondered why Atem wouldn’t have simply come out and told them this. Still, Seto didn’t celebrate his birthday. Not since... no, he wasn’t even going to think it. “Look, Anzu, I don’t celebrate my birthday. It’s not a fun day for me, okay,” Seto said, frustrated. “I know Mokuba means well when he tries to get me to celebrate my birthday but... I just don’t.”

This was the exact wrong thing to say. He should’ve known that Anzu wouldn’t leave well enough alone. “You don’t celebrate your birthday,” she said slowly, as if he had said that he liked murder puppies on the weekend. It wasn’t like it was anything weird but of course Anzu would act like it was. Of course Anzu would make it into a bigger deal than actually was. “Seto, you do a lot of weird things, but this might be the weirdest one yet. Why wouldn’t you want people to show how happy they are that you were born?”

How did he begin to explain himself? _Oh sure, Anzu, it all started back when my adoptive father thought it’d be neat to use my younger brother and I to commit tax fraud and ended with him killing himself on my birthday because I took over the company?_ Even in his head, he wasn’t sure that was the right tone to take. How did normal people explain they don’t celebrate their birthday? He wasn’t sure. “I just have a lot of reasons to not want to celebrate my birthday,” Seto said shortly, well aware this was absolutely not the end. Anzu never knew how to leave well enough alone. “All of them are deeply traumatic and I’d rather not talk about it, okay?”

That was enough, Seto realized with shock as Anzu’s fierce gaze dropped and changed. He wasn’t sure what the look in her eyes was now. Pity? Maybe he shouldn’t have been so blunt. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize,” she said quickly. “I won’t tell Atem that today’s your birthday, then. I’ll keep it between us.”

For that, he was grateful. He figured that now he just had to get to Mokuba and ask him to stop telling people his birthday. While he was very sure Mokuba meant well, Seto just didn’t want to deal with people asking him what his deal was with his birthday again. Anzu left and that meant he should probably try to talk to Mokuba about not sharing personal details with his... it was weird that Seto just realized how he’d been willing to think of Anzu as a friend. He’d been resisting for so long that he supposed it was about time he admitted Anzu was a friend to him. He did care about her, he supposed. Still, it was a weird thing to realize.

Shortly after Anzu had left, Mokuba had entered per Seto’s request. Seto didn’t even look up from his computer screen when he asked, “Why did you tell Anzu today was my birthday?”

“Figured you should start trying to celebrate your birthday again,” Mokuba said with a carefree shrug. Seto was a little bit grateful for Mokuba being so carefree. It meant the effort he had put into protect Mokuba from the traumatizing things they went through actually paid off. It meant that Seto taking the brunt of the pain shielded him. Ergo, Seto wasn’t annoyed when Mokuba was lackadaisical. It meant that all his work to protect Mokuba actually meant something. He cherished and almost even smiled whenever Mokuba didn’t seem to care about anything. That didn’t mean Mokuba couldn’t get serious when the situation required it. It just meant... Mokuba acted like a normal teenager. Something that had never been afforded to him. Still, as such, Mokuba sometimes didn’t understand why Seto acted the way he did. “Gozubora died ten years ago, _niisama_. You can’t let him haunt us forever.”

There was a specific inflection when Mokuba said ‘let him’ – as if he was trying to get at something important. Something that, once again, Seto just didn’t understand. That was the problem with Mokuba being far more well-adjusted than he was. Mokuba just didn’t carry the same scars that Seto did. And that was intentionally designed and Seto was well aware that it was his own fault that he didn’t understand his little brother sometimes. “I’m not letting him haunt us by not celebrating my birthday,” Seto said stiffly, well aware that Mokuba could see right through him. “I just think that birthdays are stupid.”

“You made that perfectly clear when you skipped out on Atem’s birthday party,” Mokuba noted as he tossed himself on the sofa, sprawling out. It seemed like this was always how they had their conversations – with Mokuba sprawling out on the sofa and Seto working at his laptop. “You know, Anzu invited me to come along. Seems that Atem really likes you considering he kept pestering me about where you were.”

Seto froze at this. Mokuba and Atem had hung out on Atem’s birthday? Why didn’t he know this? If he’d known that Anzu had invited Mokuba out, he would’ve absolutely tagged along. What better reason to be around at his rival’s birthday party than to keep an eye out for his teenaged little brother who like to get into trouble, after all? And of course, he fixated on the new information that both Anzu and Mokuba presented him that Atem _did_ ask about him when he wasn’t around. That thrilled Seto to know. “Hmph,” was all Seto said in response to this. “Like I said. There’s no point in birthdays.”

“And yet you’re more than willing to celebrate mine,” Mokuba half sang, well aware that he had Seto there. Then again, Mokuba actually liked celebrating his birthday. That made sense, since it wasn’t Mokuba’s birthday Gozubora had to die on. No, that lucky honor went to Seto. Of course... Mokuba seemed unaware of how Gozubora died. Then again... Seto never told Mokuba and he imagined most people wouldn’t have wanted to explain to an eight year old that their adoptive father committed suicide in response to their big brother taking control of his company. And thus Seto realized: Mokuba didn’t know what had happened. “I don’t understand why you don’t want to celebrate your birthday just because Gozubora died. I thought you’d be happy to be rid of him.”

The truth was so much more complicated than that. Was Seto glad to be rid of Gozubora? Of course. Did that mean he wanted to celebrate the day Gozubora died? Not particularly. He figured if any time was the time to explain, it was now. “Gozubora committed suicide on my birthday ten years ago,” he said, forgoing any formalities. “Forgive me if I don’t feel like partying over that.”

Mokuba looked shocked. “He... I didn’t know,” Mokuba said, looking almost... sad? Sad was the word to use, Seto supposed. It was then that Seto realized he had stopped working at all. His hands had been hovering over the keyboard and Mokuba hadn’t mentioned this once at all. “Is that why you never smile anymore?” Seto didn’t respond to that. “You know... since you started hanging around Atem... I noticed you smile again.”

Seto stiffened. “What’s your point?”

“My point is... that I don’t want you screwing things up with Atem cause you spend all your time overthinking everything,” Mokuba said as he sat up. “I like seeing you smile again. So... you should let Atem more. So you should tell him today’s your birthday or I will.”

“What does Atem have to do with anything,” Seto asked, alarmed that Mokuba might actually tell Atem his birthday. He wouldn’t put it past Mokuba since he was more than willing to turn traitor and tell _Anzu_ his birthday. The fact he had to trust Anzu with this secret already put him on edge and Mokuba was suggesting telling _more_ people his birthday? “He doesn’t need to know my birthday. No one needs to know my birthday. I almost wish you didn’t know when my birthday was so you couldn’t go around telling everyone about it!”

“You know exactly what Atem has to do with this,” Mokuba said as he pushed himself up off the couch. “But I’ll be calling Atem at five pm to tell him today’s your birthday. You can either have told him by then or he’ll know by tonight. Either way, your move, _niisama_.”

He hadn’t seen that coming. Mokuba turned traitor for very little, Seto realized with a stunned expression on his face. At this point, Seto’s only real regret is that he hadn’t bothered to fake a smile around Mokuba more often. Maybe if Mokuba had assumed everything was okay with him, then maybe Mokuba wouldn’t be willing to tell Atem today was Seto’s birthday. How unfortunate that it was his own younger brother that was forcing him to confront that maybe he did want Atem around for his birthday. Not that Seto was about to get on the hype train for birthdays but... he did like the idea of Atem deciding to spend the day with him. And how was it Anzu put it? Celebrate him? He really liked the idea of Atem wanting to celebrate that he existed at all. Seto leaned back in his chair, wondering if Atem actually would be willing to keep things lowkey and just between them. Maybe if he offered up something that Atem couldn’t possibly refuse... maybe then this could be just a night between the two of them. And as a bonus, maybe for once Mokuba wouldn’t make him celebrate his birthday with him.

Either way, Seto was willing to take that gamble. So he gave a resigned sigh before picking up the phone to call Atem. He was rather surprised at how quickly Atem answered the phone. “Er, hi,” Seto said, feeling rather awkward. “It’s me... Seto. Uh, I was calling to say that today is my birthday and that’s it.”

Before he could hang up, Atem blurted out, “Happy birthday! You know, I’ve spent ages on the internet trying to find your birthday. I was about to give up and ask Mokuba when you made this call.”

“Uh,” Seto said, dumfounded that Atem would waste any time trying to figure when his birthday was. Then again, this brought a new point to Seto’s attention: Atem had been at this long enough to eventually decide to throw in the towel and ask his younger brother. How long was Atem at this? Seto knew that if Atem was giving up on the challenge, it had to have been a rather long time. “I had my birthday scrubbed from the internet. I don’t need strangers knowing when I was born.”

“That’s weird,” Atem remarked. “Whenever it’s my birthday, I want literally everyone to know and celebrate my existence.”

“That’s because you’re a show off, Nasser,” Seto said with a sigh. “Not all of us are showboats.”

“Mhm, and what was the last speech you gave before our duel,” Atem said with a rather jovial laugh. “Something about how you were you going to dominate over me by winning this card game? How you were going to showcase your power or whatever? Which is really funny when we consider that you are the least dominate person I know.”

Seto’s cheeks turned pink. “That’s called showmanship, Nasser,” he snapped. “People like it.”

“Uh huh,” Atem teased. “Is that what all the dramatic posing is about?”

“You do that too!”

“But nowhere near the level that you do,” Atem remarked and it was, unfortunately, true. Atem might dramatically pose to keep up with Seto but for the most part, he was rather no frills. “Any reason you have to puff yourself up? Is this like one of those animal instincts you have? Gotta look larger than life?”

“Fuck you.”

“Happily. Name a time and place,” Atem said and even if Atem wasn’t in the same room, he just knew Atem was smirking. “Not to take away from this but uh... my sister sort of wants to meet you.”

Seto froze. His sister? He knew of Atem’s family, of course. He knew that Atem’s father was an ambassador and his mother was some sort of lawmaker. They’d only recently achieved power, from what Seto could tell. Everything that surrounded them was a long wall of political text and Seto couldn’t care to look into it further. He knew Atem had no political goals, however. Atem made that fairly clear in one of their many dive bar conversations. What he did know more about was Atem’s sister named Mana who attended a private school in Switzerland. He knew that Mana, like Atem, spoke and read at least six languages including Arabic, French, Japanese, English, German, and Italian. He knew that like Atem, Mana was a fairly active individual and was on her school’s cheerleading team. But he wasn’t going to admit he looked up Atem’s family. “Why would your sister want to meet me,” Seto finally asked. “Isn’t she in school right now?”

“Schools in Switzerland have Autumn breaks. She won’t be back in school until November. Til then... thought I show her around New York City. Anzu mentioned you’re in town too.”

Of course Anzu did. Was everyone in Seto’s social circle conspiring to ruin his life? It seemed like everyone at this point just wanted to fuck with Seto. Still... he thought again about how Anzu said that Seto owed Atem for skipping out on his birthday and how Mokuba said Atem had wanted him to show up at his birthday. Perhaps he was lucky that Atem was still trying to talk to him even after he ditched out. Were other people’s birthdays really important to them? He couldn’t fathom it. He supposed there was only one way to find out. “Uh, Atem,” Seto said slowly, hating the idea of admitting once again he didn’t get Atem the way Atem got him. It was embarrassing. “Mokuba... claims you wanted me to show up to your birthday.”

Atem paused. “Do you really want to talk about that right now,” Atem asked, his words full of venom that Seto didn’t know Atem could possess. “I recommend you leave that alone, Kaiba.”

So he was definitely a little sour about it. Seto wasn’t stupid. Still... he couldn’t understand why Atem would be so upset about his birthday being missed. Seto would give anything for people to ignore his birthday. “Oh,” Seto said in response. “Uh, then is it too late to say okay to meeting your sister?”

“Of course not.”

Seto had only just barely gotten Atem to agree to not tell Mana today was his birthday. He suspected that Atem only agreed because Seto had willingly admitted that birthdays were hard for him. That bothered him, actually. How was it that Atem could crack him open so easily? Seto never revealed personal information but it seemed like he couldn’t help himself around Atem. He found himself freely volunteering information he’d went to great lengths to avoid talking about. And for whatever reason, Atem retained the information Seto gave him and even had the nerve to remind Seto when he’d already told him something. This time, Atem retained Seto’s favorite place to eat at while he was in New York City and had suggested that they all meet there. Seto wound up agreeing even though he had no idea how Atem would manage to get reservations this late into the day.

He was surprised when he arrived to discover that they already had a table waiting for them. Atem was already sitting at the table in the restaurant’s required black blazer and slacks combo with a gold button down underneath. Would it really kill Atem to wear normal clothing, Seto thought absently as his eyes slide over to the girl sitting next to Atem. She was probably about seventeen, maybe a little younger, with the same silver eyes as Atem and dark brown hair. She was wearing a blue and pink wrap dress and Seto had to give credit for that. “You must be Seto,” she said, much more exuberantly than most people greeted Seto. “It’s so nice to finally meet you! My brother’s told me so much about you!”

He’s told his sister about him? To his credit, Atem looked sheepish but it didn’t stop the crimson from tinting Seto’s cheeks as he thought of all the ways Atem could’ve embarrassed him to his sister. Is this why she wanted to meet him? To mock him? He had half a mind to turn around and walk out but then again... if Atem was really still mad about him missing his birthday... “Exactly what did he tell you?”

“Oh, only good things,” Atem said with a wink and Seto turned bright crimson. What was it about Atem that always made him seem to blush at the slightest provocation? All Atem had to do was fucking smirk and Seto turned to putty in his hands. He hated knowing that he had a weakness. “Like the fact that you’re an excellent duelist and that you run your own company and that you’re pretty cool.”

Pretty... cool? Was Atem making fun of him now? “Yeah, he kept saying you were super cool,” Mana said as she eyed Seto up and down. “I’m guessing that you save all that for when you two are alone cause... you don’t seem cool to me.”

“Sorry to disappoint,” Seto said, a frown appearing on his face. “Is there some way I was supposed to appear to appease you specifically?”

“Well, he also said you were cute,” Mana said, making a face. “I guess my big brother here just has bad taste.”

“Mana, don’t be rude,” Atem said, looking actually... embarrassed for once. That baffled Seto. Why was _he_ embarrassed? Was he embarrassed of him specifically? He supposed it’d make sense. That’s when he noticed that Atem already had a whiskey sour in hand. He knew it was a whiskey sour because he’d seen Atem order it so many times at this point. He bet it was the cheap kind of whiskey too since Atem seemed to have no standards for what he drank. “Come on, Kaiba. Sit down. Loosen up and order a drink.”

It was not a request. And well, Atem currently held all the cards. So Seto took a seat across from Atem and ordered a Scotch, neat. Atem was observing him with that usual intense stare. He couldn’t get it out of his mind and now here it was, right in front of him. Atem’s lips twitched into a smirk as Seto’s drink arrived and Seto took a healthy gulp before realizing it might be impolite to ignore Atem’s sister. “So,” Seto said stiffly. “Atem says that you go to school in Switzerland? What’s that like?”

Seto didn’t really listen as Mana prattled on about her friends and what it was like to be on the cheerleading team. He really didn’t care – he only asked because he’d seen other people ask similar questions with him regarding his little brother. If enough people did it, then it had to be the correct move, right? He was second guessing himself again. “And I thought I might try out for football like Atem,” Mana noted with a bright grin. “But it kind of clashes with my cheer schedule so I’d have to give it up... which I really don’t want to do but I’d still have gymnastics in the winter!”

This told him nothing about what classes were like for Mana. Then again, he had zoned out earlier. Perhaps she had something about them earlier? Atem offered no help and... Seto noted Atem was on his phone. Texting someone. Suddenly that was all he could fixate on. Who was Atem texting? Would it be rude to ask? Is it rude for Atem to be on the phone? Should he call Atem out on it? Mana didn’t seem to mind so maybe it was a normal occurrence for him to start texting while she was talking. “Er, sorry, I don’t know much about sports,” Seto confessed, trying to focus away from who Atem might be texting. His stomach clenched up as he thought it might be Mahad. Was Seto boring him? He took another swing of his drink. “I’m... more centered around STEM.”

Mana giggled, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, Atem said that you, like him, are a geek,” Mana said.

“I never said it like that,” Atem spluttered, rightfully looking embarrassed. _Good_ , Seto thought. “I merely stated that Kaiba here was a math genius and I admired that because I happen to like math.”

“You like math,” Seto asked, surprised by this information. He just realized that he never bothered to ask what Atem liked. He knew that Atem liked playing card games and was very good at doing math quickly in his head, which is something that Seto liked if only because it got annoying when someone broke out the calculator to do simple math. It interrupted the flow of the game in Seto’s opinion. Everyone should just learn how to do math in their head, Seto thought absently. “I didn’t know that.”

“You didn’t,” Mana said, a strange inflection in her tone. “I thought everyone knew Atem is like, a total nerd. Then again... I guess you’d think he’s cool cause you’re also a nerd.”

What was she talking about? Atem was definitely very cool. In fact, it almost drove Seto a little crazy how cool Atem was. He was constantly thinking of all the ways Atem deserved someone so much better than Seto. Seto was never going to be the kind of guy who would want to go on hikes with Atem nor would he ever want to go rock climbing. He was almost certainly never going to be able to get one over on Atem at the rate he was going at. It was easy to compare himself unfavorably to Atem, actually. Seto’s mouth twisted into a frown. “I mean, it’s fairly obvious that Nasser is...”

“Sorry, gotta interrupt you there,” Mana said with a teasing grin. “There’s two Nassers at this table. You gotta be specific!”

Seto ground his teeth. Yes, Mana was definitely going to get on his nerves. “Fine. Atem,” Seto said and he almost hated how Atem’s stare on him was so intense. He definitely wasn’t on his phone anymore. That in itself was something Seto could appreciate. “Atem is obviously very cool. Apparently too cool for us.”

This threw Atem off. “What are you talking about?”

Mana rolled her eyes. “Is this about him texting earlier,” she asked and Seto was stunned. Apparently, all Nassers had the ability to see right through him. He didn’t like that. As far as he was concerned, a whole family having the trait to pierce right through him was just too much to handle. “It was probably just Mahad or Yugi.”

Even worse, Seto thought with alarm. If she had said it was Anzu or Jonouchi or hell, that weirdo occult shop manager they were all friends with... what was his name, again? Ryou? Bakura? something like that... Seto could’ve handled it. Unfortunately, this was just confirmation that Mahad and Yugi both had Atem’s attention and held it far better than Seto ever could. Seto took another swig of his drink and realized that it was empty far too quick. They hadn’t even ordered dinner yet. That was unfortunate. Now Atem was going to bug him all night about drinking enough water or something. “I see,” Seto said, his teeth grinding again. “I’m sure Mutou is just simply far more interesting, then.”

“Actually, it was Sugoroku,” Atem said with an awkward cough as he pushed a glass of water towards Seto. Of course he would. However, Seto was far more fixated on the name. Sugoroku... as in Sugoroku Mutou? Mutou’s grandfather? Like any good competitor, Seto knew about Mutou’s family life. Father was out of the picture, lived with his mother and his grandfather growing up in a game shop. Mutou credited his love of games to growing up in that game shop from what Seto recalled. Now why would Atem be texting Mutou’s grandfather? “He wanted me to ask Yugi to make sure he was going to have Chanukah free this year.”

“And why couldn’t Mutou’s grandfather pass that message on himself,” Seto asked before he could stop himself. It wasn’t his business. He shouldn’t be be prying. But by God, did he want to pry. “I would think Mutou would answer the phone for his own grandfather.”

“Yugi was busy and he tends to overwork himself during the holidays,” Atem said simply though this still was not an explanation as far as Seto was concerned. It still didn’t explain why Yugi might answer the phone for Atem but not for his own grandfather. “He winds up letting a lot of things slip through the cracks so Sugoroku wanted all of us to remind Yugi to take some time off,” Atem added on, as if he was reading Seto’s mind and answering the questions that Seto posed in his head. Still, Seto couldn’t help but wonder what it was like to have this many people care about one person. Did Yugi really need multiple people reminding him of the same thing? “It’s as simple as that, really.”

“I see,” Seto said, rather curt. And, before he could stop himself, he found the words, “so Mutou can’t invest in a calendar,” flying out of his mouth. The effect was rather instant. Atem seemed to frown and Mana shifted uncomfortably in her seat. He realized that this was exactly the wrong thing to say just a little too late. It was too late to cram the words back into his mouth.

“It’s not my place to explain, but... I suppose Yugi won’t mind if I tell you that he’s ADHD,” Atem said before taking a swing of his own drink. “He either overworks or takes forever to get started on something. It’s only gotten worse and he tends to overcompensate by working too hard during the holidays, as if he can catch up on everything he missed during the year by overworking himself.”

This was not what he was expecting to hear. “Oh,” Seto said and that was all he could say.

“I mean, you shouldn’t feel too bad,” Mana said, rather awkwardly. “I’m... assuming you didn’t know, right?”

Once again, a Nasser sibling reading him just a little too well for comfort. How could she tell that Seto was uncomfortable and felt bad about what he had said? “No,” Seto admitted. “But I don’t know much about Mutou besides what’s public information. I assume he keeps this to himself for a reason. Won’t he be mad if he finds out you told me?”

“It’s not exactly hidden,” Atem said with a wave of his hand. “He doesn’t freely volunteer it at every press conference but he doesn’t mind talking about it. He figures it’s good for ADHD kids to see that they can find coping mechanisms that help them feel more confident in themselves and their own abilities.”

Mana then made a remark in a language that Seto was unfamiliar with and Atem replied in the same language with a more irked tone. It was then that Seto realized the disadvantage of hanging out with two siblings who spoke more languages than he did. He knew right away it wasn’t Arabic or French – he had enough passing understanding to at least pick up a few words. Whatever it was they were speaking; they were intentionally leaving him out of the loop. “Sorry to interrupt, but,” Seto said, a flush across his cheeks, “Is there a reason you’re leaving me out of the conversation?”

“It’s nothing,” Mana said rather dismissively. “Just teasing my brother here.”

“She’s always doing that,” Atem said with a rather sour look on his face. “I feel like it’s the kid sibling honor code to bother their sibling.”

“Has to be,” Seto said before he could help himself. Mokuba had annoyed him into telling Atem when his birthday was, after all.

“Oh, I see how it is. Everyone cares about when the big brothers are annoyed but no one considers the little siblings,” Mana complained. “You should’ve brought Mokuba. I bet he could tell us how you’ve annoyed him.”

“No one considers the little siblings,” Atem asked incredulously. “One time you came home upset and dad made us drop everything to get you ice cream because you were upset! I came home upset and dad told me to toughen up!”

“Well, you should’ve considered that I’m adorable and you aren’t,” Mana said, sticking her tongue out at Atem. “Also you never say anything when you’re upset, so... whose fault is it really that no one babied you when you were upset, oh mighty king of drama?”

That was two people close to Atem that addressed Atem with royal titles. One mocking and one that seemed more of a fond nickname. Seto had to wonder what it meant. Atem didn’t seem like the kind of person to demand people address him formally. In fact, Seto had never once addressed Atem formally. He personally wanted to try it. “People should just know,” Atem said after a brief moment’s pause. “Everyone should just automatically sense how I’m feeling and react accordingly.”

“That might be a little difficult since some of us have a hard enough time with our own emotions. Why should we put up with yours as well,” Seto remarked, unable to help himself.

“He’s got a point,” Mana said with a cheeky grin. “You have too many emotions. I don’t wanna deal with that.”

“Everyone just loves to bully me,” Atem complained. “I should’ve never introduced you two to each other. Now you’re both just going to bully me.”

Mana rolled her eyes and Seto was surprised that Atem seemed to believe that Seto would actually hang out with Mana independently again. Then again, considering how Anzu had forced her friendship upon him, he wouldn’t be surprised that most people believed that was the kind of people he wanted to be friends with. And Mana did heavily remind of him Anzu. “God, stop bullying yourself,” Mana said with a snort.

As the night went on, the conversation seemed to touch on things Seto wouldn’t have thought to ask Atem about. He learned that Atem occasionally tutored Mana in her STEM classes, that Atem had a passing understanding of Swiss German, and that Atem’s father thought that Atem should go into politics. Mana had laughed at that, stating that she’d never want to live anywhere that Atem had power in. Seto had thought Atem actually showed a lot of leadership qualities he didn’t want to give himself credit for. He was certain in another life, Atem might’ve been a great leader. He was charming, charismatic, and well... Seto didn’t mind following whatever Atem told him to do. He wasn’t about to compliment Atem so openly, however, so he said nothing.

He couldn’t begin to explain how he ended up agreeing to meet up with Atem after Atem dropped Mana back at her hotel. All he knew was that Atem asked and Seto couldn’t stop himself from saying yes. It seemed like no matter what, he was bound to say yes to everything Atem asked of him. He wasn’t about to admit that to Atem out of concern he might take advantage of that weakness. Part of him feared Atem already knew of his weakness for him, actually. He didn’t like having a spot this open. It was like he handed Atem a knife that could slice him open with no guarantee that Atem wouldn’t use it on him. The fact Atem had him like this honestly scared him at times.

Of course, there was the fact he was also suppressing the very real chance that Atem might just be doing this specifically to get closer to him and acting as a spy for Mutou. Perhaps that was the real reason he kept trying to avoid opening to Atem. He couldn’t get hurt if he never let his castle walls down in the first place. This had the very real chance of ruining him. He was certain that Atem could cut him into pieces if he wanted to and he simply had to trust that Atem wouldn’t. In many ways, he felt like he was drowning in his own emotions and couldn’t even begin to piece together how he actually felt. He was a hostage to his own feelings.

But when they were alone, it was just so simple. Atem would press his lips to Seto’s, Seto’s back would end up pressed against the wall, and Atem’s hips would be pressed into his. The clothes would come off and then there was nothing between them. In this, Seto was Atem’s to keep and Atem’s to lose – his choice, really. Seto was always just so caught up in the moment that he couldn’t begin to focus on how this could all completely destroy him. He just focused on the feeling of Atem’s mouth on his neck, of Atem’s soft moans into his skin, and how _easy_ it was for Atem to just _know_ where to touch, to kiss, to bite that would just make Seto _melt_. And it was even easier after a few rounds of drinks.

He wasn’t sure how Atem and him had gotten together in the shower, wasn’t sure how they ended up surrounded by the steaming hot water while Atem pressed him against the shower wall. However they ended up here, it didn’t matter. What mattered is just how good it felt to have Atem pressed to him, how _nice_ the warm water felt and how soothing Atem’s rough, bruising kisses felt. He wasn’t surprised to find himself on his knees yet again. At this point, it was a welcome distraction from his thoughts to focus merely on Atem’s pleasure and focus on how much he could take in his mouth. In fact, it was starting to become one of his favorite forms of distraction.

Atem was always willing to help distract Seto and for that, Seto was grateful.


	4. and all the pieces fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> right into place, getting caught up in the moment... lipstick on your face. i'm yours to keep and i'm yours to lose. you know i'm not bad girl but i do bad things with you

Seto had no idea how Atem had convinced him to come with him to Las Vegas. As per usual, Atem was making a spectacle of himself dressed in a sheer button down black shirt that had some sort of glittering effect in the lights and fringe off the sleeves tucked into leather pants. Said button down was also opened to give a better peak of his chest and a gold necklace around his neck. The many rings on his fingers were also very distracting. In fact, everything about Atem was always just so damn distracting. As much as Seto wanted to focus on Atem, there was, unfortunately, the fact that Mahad was also here. Mahad had a reason to be here, of course. The reason wasn’t to get on Seto’s nerves but unfortunately, he was.

Mahad had a reason for standing at least six feet behind them at all times, Seto reminded himself. He was here to protect Atem. That was his job. Seto had, unfortunately, made the mistake of having more than one glass of Scotch in a desperate attempt to ignore the blind rage building in him. The final straw had absolutely been when Atem called Mahad over specifically to have Mahad blow on his dice for “luck” as Atem put it. It took everything in Seto to not punch Mahad in the face for actually going along with Atem’s request. “You know luck isn’t real,” Seto blurted out before he could help himself. “Blowing on the dice isn’t going to change how you roll.”

“Disagree,” Atem said as he rolled the dice and the bastard actually rolled exactly what he needed to in order to win as everyone at the table cheered. Seemed Atem’s roll had been beneficial for more than just himself, Seto noted with bitterness. “See? Mahad’s blows are clearly extremely lucky. Never once rolled bad when he’s blowing on my dice.”

Did Atem really have to state it like that? The worst part of it all is that he looks so pretty like a devil when he was being this arrogant. As much as he hated Mahad, he hated Atem even more right now. He thought he knew Atem when he was playing a game but it was very clear he did not. Atem was indeed a showman and he gravitated towards the games that gave him the most chances to show off. There was something about how the dangling earrings in Atem’s ears moved when he tilted his head, as if calculating the odds of something in his head. Each time Atem threw the dice, it seemed graceful and almost calculated in his effort. Was it really Mahad blowing on Atem’s dice giving Atem the luck he needed? Seto had watched as Atem held the two dice between his fingers before flipping them into his palm and throwing them. Each time, the dice always seemed to land on exactly what Atem needed.

Seto had always wonder if devils rolled the dice and now he had an answer. Atem, pretty as a devil and twice as wicked, Seto thought errantly. What a ridiculous way to view someone. It was odd to view Atem, someone so angelic at times, as a devil but Seto knew better at this point. He wondered if he was allowing his own issues with religion cloud how he viewed Atem. Sometimes Atem seemed like a saving grace and other times Atem seemed hell bent on dragging Seto straight to Hell. As of right now, he felt like he was in Hell.

He wasn’t about to cause a scene when everyone around here knew both who he and Atem were. What surprised Seto was how many people here treated Atem differently from the other patrons. It seemed like Atem was a high roller here. After seeing how easily Atem won at craps, he started to suspect this was exactly how Atem made his cash. He’d always wondered how Atem afforded half his designer clothing and what appeared to be very fancy lotion and expensive makeup. Now he had an answer as he watched Atem effortlessly triple his money at the craps table before getting bored. “Come on,” he said, grabbing Seto’s hand without any fear of anyone noticing. It was like an electric current ran through Seto and if Seto had been sober, he absolutely would’ve put a stop that. Then again, neither he nor Atem were sober right now. “Let’s go play poker. I’m the best at that.”

“You’re the best at everything,” Seto blurted out without thinking and immediately he wished he could take it back.

He was rewarded for this high risk move with a laugh from Atem and Atem winking at him. “At everything, hm,” Atem asked as he pulled Seto aside into a secluded corner of the casino where the was little risk of the two of them being spotted. A thrill ran down Seto’s back as Atem gave him a quick kiss. “Am I the best at that?”

“Absolutely,” breathed Seto, unable to believe his luck. “Like I said: best at everything.”

Atem’s smirk only grew, kissing Seto’s cheek. “You haven’t even seen me play poker yet,” he said, his hands firm on Seto’s hips. For once, Seto didn’t care that Mahad was nearby. In fact, he was wondering if it was awkward for Mahad to deal with Atem sneaking off to kiss someone. Part of Seto hoped that this was enough to claim Atem openly in front of Mahad. Seto wanted to make it clear that Atem was _his_. “I might be terrible at it.”

“I don’t believe that.”

Atem chuckled lightly as he pressed a quick kiss to Seto’s neck. “You’re right to not believe it. I’m a fantastic poker player.”

“And so humble too,” Seto remarked as Atem pulled away and Seto almost wished that he was bold enough to suggest they get a room together. As it stood, Seto absolutely was not about to take the risk that someone might see them sneaking off to a hotel together. “Truly, we’re so lucky to have the great and humble Atem show off his poker skills for all to see.”

The worst part of it all was that true to his word, Atem was indeed a fantastic poker player. Seto thought that Atem might have a terrible poker face considering how easy he was to read but it seemed like something about Atem changed at the poker table. It didn’t matter how good Atem’s poker face because it seemed like somehow, he always knew exactly how to get the right cards in his hand. It wasn’t until the tenth round in that Seto realized the obvious: Atem was counting the cards. At first he could’ve sworn that was ridiculous. Of course Atem didn’t know how to count cards. But as the rounds went on, there was simply no other explanation for Atem’s uncanny ability to read exactly what the other players had in their hands, what was left in the deck, and what to aim for when returning cards for new ones.

He supposed he shouldn’t have been surprised. Atem’s deck in Duel Monsters was fairly tightly built but Seto had assumed there was a luck based component to it. No, Atem must’ve been familiar enough with his deck to know what he needed and when he’d get it. Seto wondered if that tracked – would Atem just be that crafty to be well aware what to do next? Or... it felt like Atem could see right through Seto, actually. Just like he could see right through everyone at this table. His silver eyes seemed to see truth and there was simply no hiding from what he sought to learn. It seemed like there was no escape when Atem wanted to win. As such, Atem was consistently winning the jackpot while Seto was struggling to keep on to his cash.

At some point, Seto noted it would be simply more practical for him to pull the cash out of his wallet and give it straight to Atem rather than waste time with this card game. This card game that... showed off how very intelligent Atem was. Seto was fascinated by the furrow of Atem’s brow as he watched the dealer shuffle and the fact Atem’s face was almost always set in a smirk. It was like Atem couldn’t help it – he had a resting smirk on his face. Seto almost wished he could get away with just sitting in Atem’s lap. He wondered vaguely if it’d feel like he was a trophy that Atem had won. He was surprised just how okay with that he was. In fact, it was just a little too tempting of a thought. He pushed it away, trying instead to focus on the game that he was badly losing from how distracted he was by Atem.

He knew he should fold but there was just something about Atem that kept him from backing down from a challenge. In fact, there was something outright thrilling about the idea of losing to Atem specifically. It was just how _smug_ Atem got about that really got Seto. He couldn’t begin to explain himself on that, either. It should be pure humiliation when Atem gets one over on him but instead there was a slight thrilling edge to it.

That was probably how he ended up in the bathroom again, Atem’s mouth on his. If it wasn’t for the buzz of the alcohol, Seto might’ve pointed out that just about anybody could walk into this bathroom and find them in this compromising position. It wasn’t like they could just lock this bathroom. Sure, Mahad was right outside but still... “Is Mahad going to breathe down our necks the entire time,” Seto said, frustrated that Mahad wouldn’t just leave them alone. “Can’t he leave us alone for two seconds?”

“I suppose he could but then he might risk my dad firing him,” Atem said, almost distracting as he pressed rough, bruising kisses against Seto’s neck. “It’s kind of his job to take care of me and make sure I don’t die, you know.”

Seto huffed, rolling his eyes. “Oh and I’m sure _you_ don’t mind,” Seto said, pushing Atem off him. “No other reason to keep around besides his job, right?”

Atem looked puzzled by this, as if gears were turning in his head. “I... I’m sorry, I don’t follow,” Atem said after a few moments. “He gets paid to make sure I don’t die and that I don’t get into any more trouble then I already get into. That’s what Mahad is here for.”

“Is calling you ‘young prince’ part of his job description?”

Atem frowned at this. “Well, no, but -”

“And is it part of his job description to blow on your dice?”

Seto was certain that he had Atem cornered now. After all, what sort of explaination could Atem possibly have for that? Seto had seen it happen with his own eyes, after all. “I was going to say that Mahad’s called me that since I was fifteen and since Mahad was twenty five when he started taking care of me, I really doubt he means anything by it other than a nickname that was supposed to make me feel less like a baby being taken care of,” Atem said with a frown, “but are you really that upset I asked Mahad to blow on my dice? I’m certain it annoys him more than anything.”

“I’m not upset,” Seto said, anger flaring up in his chest. How could Atem be so flippant about something that was making Seto on edge? It was made even worse knowing that Mahad probably knew Atem better than Seto ever could. “Besides, what does Mahad knowing you since you were fifteen have to do with anything?”

To this, Atem seemed at a loss for words. At first, Seto thought he’d got Atem. “Uh... Mahad has a boyfriend his own age that he’s been dating for five years now,” Atem said finally, rather awkwardly. Seto deflated almost instantly. Did this mean he’d been worked up worrying that Atem and Mahad were secretly sleeping together behind his back for nothing? “Seriously, do you really think that I would date a guy ten years older than me that I’ve known since I was fifteen? You do know that’s a weird thing to do, right, Kaiba?”

His cheeks flushed at the challenge. “I...,” he started, trying to find a counter to Atem’s argument. Unfortunately, there simply were no good counter arguments when the other declared something ‘weird’. “I just... I thought...”

Atem’s gaze was too intense and Seto shrank back away from it. Once again, he had to wonder how one 5’6” man managed to pack so much intimidation into such a short frame. “You thought what?”

He thought what indeed. It seemed like Atem was trying to draw something out of Seto but Seto had no idea what. He was certain that if this was a duel, he would’ve lost. Atem just seemed to know exactly all the right buttons to push. He wasn’t sure how Atem had managed to bust through so many of his walls when he thought he’d be so careful. He thought he managed to keep himself safe from harm but instead, here Atem was, standing right inside his castle walls. “I thought,” Seto said, trying to stop himself from saying the next words. He could not possibly show his hand like this. Not here, not now. And yet he couldn’t stop himself. “I thought that maybe... maybe I wasn’t enough for you.”

To his great surprise, this seemed to actually have an effect on Atem. There was a wide variety of expressions that went across Atem’s face and Seto couldn’t name a single one of them. That was the thing about Atem that Seto had noticed: Atem was very expressive and sometimes, Seto just didn’t know what to make of what Atem was thinking. This is where Atem had the upper hand. He somehow seemed to always know what Seto was thinking whereas Seto just had to make his best guess at what Atem was thinking. And usually, as he was starting to discover, he was wrong. It was like Atem had an entirely different thought process from Seto, unique and undiscovered. Seto thought he could figure out Atem but it seemed like he was mistaken.

The words were agonizing and hung between them and Seto just wished he could read Atem’s mind like an open book. It would be so much better if he knew what Atem was thinking. If he knew what Atem was thinking, he could prepare himself for whatever came next. Being vulnerable was a new risk and Seto knew that if he had been sober, he never would’ve admitted it. He almost wished that instead of waiting for Atem’s answer, Atem would just kiss him instead. Seto would rather be tasting the crappy drinks Atem liked to order on Atem’s mouth than dealing with the fall out of admitting what he just admitted. It was taking too long for Atem to speak. Seto silently begged him to say something, anything.

Anything to end this nightmare of being completely open in front of Atem. If he thought Atem held a knife before, he had now handed Atem a gun instead. Atem had the option to shoot him dead with his words if he’d like. That was the real fear, Seto realized. Atem knew Seto better than Seto knew Atem. How he wished he knew what was clicking together in his brain. The fluorescent lights of this bathroom were too bright and too distracting. However, he could not leave until he knew what was on Atem’s mind. It seemed like he was chained here, desperate to know how Atem felt about him. “Kaiba,” he finally said, sounding strange. “I.. I didn’t know you felt that way.”

That was all Atem had to say? After Seto had borne his soul and fears to Atem, all Atem could say was that _he didn’t know_? Was Atem just fucking with him? Seto felt almost insulted. He was getting real tired of trying to analyze Atem’s every action only for the answer to be so mundane. He was even more sick of the fact that Atem seemed to not realize that Seto was overthinking every single action they did, every single word spoken between them. Was this all in Seto’s head? Did he even have a right to be angry with an opponent that was never playing the same game that he was? “Is that really all you’re going to say,” Seto snapped before he could help himself. He felt like a trapped animal in a cage, desperately gnawing at the bars to be let out. “That you didn’t know?”

Once again, Atem took far longer than Seto would like to respond. Everything that Seto wanted to know was inside Atem’s head. His salvation or damnation laid right at Atem’s feet and he hated that Atem had all the power in this situation. Atem held all the cards while Seto had nothing. It simply wasn’t fair. Seto longed to be on equal footing with Atem but how could he ever hope to be on equal footing with a man like Atem? “Kaiba,” Atem said and only now did Seto realize that Atem had been slurring his words this whole time. Atem, like Seto, was not sober either. “Kaiba... Seto, Seto, don’t you get it?”

Once again, Atem seemed hell bent on insulting Seto by asking if he got it. At this point, Seto was certain that he never was going to get whatever Atem wanted him to get. “You should know well enough by now that I clearly don’t ‘get it’ when you ask that question,” Seto snapped. “Can you ever just tell it to me straight for once?”

Atem laughed. “I don’t think I can tell you anything straight,” Atem said with a smile that quickly twisted into a frown. Was that supposed to be a joke? Could Atem never take anything seriously? “Seto... I _love_ you. That’s... that’s what I’m trying to get at here. I don’t understand why you don’t see that. I’ve been so damn _obvious_.”

Seto’s mind went completely blank for a minute, two minutes, three minutes... he couldn’t figure out how to think anymore. What did he say in response to this? What was the normal reaction? How did one react to a god admitting that they loved you? It was a scenario that Seto was wholly unprepared for. He’d never really gotten to the point of saying those three little words to anyone. He was certain that he thought that it wasn’t even really an option. And Seto found himself having the worst possible reaction: he laughed. Not that he wanted to laugh, but it was just the only thing he could bring himself to do. And then the worst possible words he could react with flew right out of his mouth before he could cram them back in: “You what?”

This was obviously the wrong to say. Seto knew it was the wrong reaction long before he even said it. He had thought he might be cool when Atem said those words and yet... yet, he couldn’t stop himself. After spending so long dreaming about Atem saying those words, when faced with them... he couldn’t stop himself. “I...,” Atem responded with a frown. “I love you. I just... I...” Atem was stumbling over his words and Seto hated seeing Atem immediately lose all confidence. He’d never seen Atem look this _awkward_ before. Seto’s heart thudded in his chest as he had the realization _he_ made Atem like this. For once, Seto wished he could be normal and respond to someone telling him something as plain and simple as ‘I love you’ appropriately. “I just... thought you should know, since... you were getting jealous and that... well...”

“That what,” Seto said, unable to help himself. It was only then that a singular thought broke though the haze of alcohol: was Atem mocking him? He had to be mocking him. He was so caught up in the excitement of Atem saying something that wonderful that it never occurred to him that it was obviously playing on the buried emotions that Seto felt for Atem. Was all of this an act? “That you could just... mock me like that?”

Shock crossed Atem’s face. “What,” he exclaimed. “Seto, I’m not mocking you! I really do love you. At this point, god knows why when you’re hell bent on trying to make this harder than it has to be!”

Of course. “I’m not making anything harder than it has to be,” Seto said, unable to stop himself at this point. He almost believed Atem. Almost. But at the same time, nothing could stop Seto when he was scared. Atem loving him would mean there was something tangible between them that could break in two and Seto didn’t want to deal with that. He didn’t want to deal with the chance that Atem could shatter his heart into pieces if he’d like. Every emotion Atem was using to tie himself to Seto was yet another weapon that could slice Seto apart if he wasn’t careful. The more he pushed Atem away, however, the more Atem seemed to keep coming back. He supposed he wasn’t any better himself. “You’re the one who decided to... just... why do you insist on making this something!”

“Because it is,” Atem half yelled, looking actually properly angry for once. “You’re the one who keeps trying push me away! I keep on trying to make something here between us and you keep shoving me away, never really letting me in. Have you considered that it’d be nice to let me know if you want this too? Don’t you get it? I’m trying. Seto, please, I’m...”

He was surprised to see Atem properly angry and stumbling over his words. For once, Atem wasn’t the one in charge anymore. And Seto was floundering as a result. He wished that Atem would just calm down already. Seto wasn’t equipped to deal with this many emotions at once. His head was spinning and Seto stumbled back himself, realizing he had no proper answers for what to do. “I...,” Seto finally said, not certain what he wanted anymore. God, he knew he wanted Atem. He knew that he wanted Atem to be properly his, tangibly and for real. But he didn’t want to risk getting hurt in the process and being with Atem truly, physically, tangibly meant taking a huge risk on Atem. It meant letting Atem hold a knife over his heart, knowing Atem could cut it out any minute. “I don’t want to be vulnerable. I don’t want to get hurt.”

It was the most honest he could be with Atem and something crossed Atem’s face. The words hung in the air and there was nothing Seto could do to take them back. Both of them were drunk, Seto realized. They were drunk in a bathroom in Vegas. This was the place where all bad choices were made. This is the crossroads he was at. “Then let’s be serious,” Atem said. “Let’s.. let’s get married.”

Atem had to be joking, Seto thought errantly. They couldn’t possibly be that cliched. “Just because we’re in Vegas doesn’t mean we have to make the most cliched rushed choice known to man, Nasser,” Seto spat out. “We’re not getting married.”

Seto might as well have thrown a drink in Atem’s face for his reaction. Atem looked more than annoyed at this point. “Then what the fuck do you want,” Atem asked. “I keep asking you this: what do you want from me? I’ve been as open and honest with you as I possibly can be and you just... you just keep throwing up wall after wall!”

“Have you been honest with me?”

Atem, if possible, looked even madder. “Of course I’ve been honest with you,” Atem said, huffing. “I have never once done anything to suggest otherwise. I don’t know why you can’t trust me. We’ve been at this for what? Eight months now? What use would it be for me to have been dishonest with you for eight months?”

To this, Seto had no answer. It was true that Atem and him had been sleeping together for eight months now. And it was true that Seto had no reason to not believe Atem at his word. Atem seemed bound by a very strict honor code, actually. He thought that it was just chaos that Atem lived in but no... there was a rule of law to how Atem acted. Atem seemed staunchly against lying and he hated cheaters. He seemed to hold himself strict to these rules, even when it was determinantal to him. What could Seto say in response to that? “So we’ve been sneaking around for eight months together,” Seto said with a frown. “What does that change anything?”

Atem seemed stunned. “What do you mean by what does that change,” Atem asked. “Do you think that me being in love with you is something that just happened? Don’t you get it, Seto? I’ve loved you for some time now and... god, I don’t know why I’m trying to explain this to you. You always seem so intent on bending my words for whatever fucking works for this fucked up version of me you got in your head, anyway.”

Seto would say that wasn’t fair but Atem had a point, unfortunately. Seto just could never leave well enough alone. He kept picking and picking until he’d overthought literally every single aspect of this relationship. He’d spent so long trying to keep himself shielded from any harm that he missed that Atem had long handed Seto a knife of his own. Of course Atem still held a weapon in hand that could destroy Seto. Seto just simply hadn’t realized he had a weapon in hand himself. He never noticed that Atem had allowed Seto to see him. If only he had noticed sooner. Would he have allowed his walls to come crumbling down if he’d known Atem was opening himself up to the same hurt Seto was opened up to? Could he even admit it now? Atem had broken through all defenses whether Seto admitted to it or not. It was still such a large step, however. Admitting was terrifying.

If he admitted that Atem had managed to break down those walls, then Atem had essentially won. Life itself was a game, after all. And if this was a game, then so was everything involved in this process of... whatever was going on between him and Atem. Atem, who had willingly placed a knife in Seto’s hands and dared Seto to cut him open. How could Seto not take a second look when Atem was so desperate for him to see? He thought he had it all figured out and now... now Seto was starting to see. Atem’s false confidence that covered up fear, the way Atem’s cocky smirk was a mask, and how Atem was now willing to drop all of it just for Seto. How did Seto ever think there was anything to be jealous of? He wasn’t sure, anymore. His entire world view had been challenged in one single go.

The response was easy and natural at this point. He pulled Atem for a kiss. Seto might not be able to say the words out loud, but he could pour it into this single physical action. Atem, thankfully, understood. He seemed to grasp that Seto was not ready to admit his feelings and not ready to say anything out loud. Seto never really needed to say words with Atem. It was like Atem knew when to not press and that’s when something else clicked together for Seto: Atem never once pressured Seto into anything. He always thought it had been some kind of trick on Atem’s part and now he saw it for what it was: Atem truly meant what he said when he said he cared about Seto. There was no secret behind anything Atem ever said. His words were honest and true.

Everything about Atem had always been open and upfront and Seto had been desperately searching for subtext to suggest otherwise. Why? Seto couldn’t figure out why he would deliberately ruin his own happiness by seeking out a suggestion that the man in front of him secretly longed to hurt him. He thought he understood himself better than that. Once again, Atem had known better than Seto had. Once again, Seto was facing himself and realizing that he didn’t know himself at all. It had been so easy to push Atem away out of fear that Atem might hurt him. It was easier if he let him believe that was the only reason he would self-sabotage like that. Instead, he had to come face to face with the fact that he really feared the potential heartbreak that came along with opening oneself up to love.

The idea that Atem was honest in his love scared Seto for the very reason he refused to say it even now. “Can we get out of here,” Seto said softly. “Just... I want to be alone with you.”

It was the most honest thing Seto had said so far and Atem was more than willing to comply. Mahad was the one to order them a car and help find an out of the way motel where neither of them would be spotted. In the glow of the vending machine outside the casino, Seto could fixate on all the ways Atem had proven over and over again that he was worth his trust. The trust that Seto almost always denied Atem out of fear of being proven wrong. It had been so hard to come to the realization that maybe, just maybe, he was wrong about Atem’s motivations. In retrospect, it had been so obvious that Atem gave no reason to doubt him but Seto had been so caught up in his own paranoia and fears that he failed a spot check. Atem was right – Seto hadn’t been trying hard enough to make this work. Atem had been trying and Seto had been doing everything in his power to make this not work.

It had been his fault that they had taken until November to reach this point. It was his fault that he boarded up his walls and wouldn’t let Atem in. If he had only simply allowed himself to trust, Atem would’ve been his long ago. Seto couldn’t figure out what it was that made Atem so patient with him. It couldn’t be just the nights they spent alone together. There had to be something he was missing. And he was nervous to ask. Did he really want to know what it was that made Atem so desperate to make this work with Seto when Atem could have just about anyone he wanted? What if he didn’t like the answer? Once again, Seto caught himself trying to sabotage and he knew it was going to be a difficult habit to break. But maybe... maybe learning to break that habit of self-destruction would be nicer with someone he liked.

Was it even just like? He was certain that he’d long past that feeling ages ago. The best way he could summarize his feelings were a constant dull blue, a confusing emotion to feel. Getting into the car with Atem was familiar, easy. Atem’s hand reached for Seto’s and Seto allowed Atem to hold his hand. It was a brazen act in Seto’s opinion. Seto hated public signs of affection but Atem made it look so effortless. Seto wished he could be as effortless as Atem in terms of being okay with people knowing who he really is. He didn’t understand why Atem was eager to let Seto know him.

Even after Seto had spent months dodging all of Atem’s attempts to know him, Atem was more than willing to allow Seto to know him. Could Seto allow that? Could Seto tolerate that? All the questions swam in his head and all of them were silenced when Atem’s lips were pressed to his. All his concerns about how Atem must be angry at Seto for being unable to say those three words back were suppressed in his head. All he could focus on now was that they were really going to a _motel_ of all places. A motel felt scandalous. It felt almost dirty. And yet that thrilled Seto as Atem’s hands were, yet again, shameless in how they grabbed at his body.

Atem, once again, was shameless as he openly, brazenly kissed Seto as they made it up to their room. Seto found himself wondering if he could just bring himself to say it, just be honest for once in his life. Open up to someone despite his fear of what could happen. Could he surrender himself completely? Would he surrender himself completely? The idea of surrendering just felt so good at this point as Atem pushed him into the room. _More than physical at this point_ , Seto thought through the haze in his brain that focused purely on how good it felt to be adored by Atem. This time, he was well aware that the adoration went beyond the physical. He was aware of Atem’s feelings and where Atem’s heart was. “You’re wonderful,” Atem had breathed against Seto’s neck as Seto found himself pinned to the wall. Vaguely, Seto was aware that these walls must be paper thin. “And just so pretty.”

Despite the fact that Atem had been saying this for the past eight months, for the first time tonight Seto believed him. Seto allowed himself to believe that Atem might actually, truly care for him. Atem pinned Seto against the wall and Seto, for once, allowed himself to be honest in what he wanted. “Don’t be gentle,” Seto managed to get out. “You’re always so gentle and I just... want you to get rough with me for once.”

If this request seemed strange to Atem, he said nothing. Instead, he merely complied as Seto’s clothes fell to the floor, leaving Seto in an exposed state. Atem’s pin, for once, was not lose and easy to break free from. It was a nice change of pace to feel completely under Atem’s control. Surrendering to Atem was just so easy, Seto decided, and had such amazing perks. Perk number one: Atem’s hands on him and the fact that he’d be marked at Atem’s later. Perk number two: Atem’s kisses, which alternate between feather light and bruising and were both so dizzyingly wonderful. It seemed that now all Seto ever thought about was how to get Atem to simply kiss him again. Perk number three: the way Atem’s body felt pressed up against his.

He couldn’t free himself to take off Atem’s clothing, unfortunately, and discovered the one drawback to his request for Atem to be rougher. It meant now he was, more or less, at Atem’s complete mercy. His head spun as he realized just how okay with that he was. In fact, part of him almost wished the knife wasn’t a metaphorical one at all.


	5. right into place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> caught up in a moment... lipstick on your face... i'm yours to keep and i'm yours to lose....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys so much for putting with such long in betweens updates! thank you so much to ruby for beta'ing this.

Seto supposed he should be insulted, but he really wasn’t. He knew the game Atem had been playing when Atem decided to make the bold move to send a gift of lacey black lingerie right to Seto’s office. And well, two could absolutely play at that game. He picked up his phone and texted Atem to let Atem know he’d received his “gift,” and that he would be more than happy to wear it to dinner tonight under his suit, if that’s what Atem would like. Atem almost immediately texted back that he absolutely would like that, followed up with a text that he would actually prefer Seto put it on now and send a photo. Seto flushed furiously at the text and eventually landed on texting back that he was at work and he would see Atem later tonight.

This was the thing with sort of dating Atem that Seto had noticed over the past four months. Atem was never one to hide exactly what he wanted, and for the most part, Seto liked that. Except it could definitely be very distracting at work. He’d shoved the lingerie set into his drawer, trying to set it aside from his mind as he went back to work. But then he started thinking about how he really wanted to find out if Atem would actually like it, or if it was one of those fantasies Atem would decide is better in his head. And wouldn’t it suck if he got to the end of the night and Atem wound up deciding the fantasy was better than reality? Wouldn’t it be better if he knew before they got to the date night part? And once again, he realized these were the exact questions Atem knew Seto would start immediately overthinking. Because that was what Seto did: he overthought everything.

Even now, he was overthinking both their relationship status—they had yet to make things official, despite doing almost everything that he assumed boyfriends do—and if he should just send Atem the naughty photos he was clearly after. Thankfully, a text from Anzu interrupted his thought process. She’d attached a photo of the set of her play, along with a message that everything was ready for next week. Anzu was clearly excited that opening night was only days away, and Seto already had a flight from Japan to New York booked for tomorrow. Atem had pestered Seto into flying with him and Atem seemed staunchly against taking a private jet. While he was willing to fly commercial because Atem wanted it for whatever reason, he was absolutely not taking anything less than first class.

So maybe he was fixated on many things right now. An improvement from almost a year ago when he would only fixate on one thing at a time. He texted back Anzu that he and Atem were going to be in New York in two days’ time. Anzu, thankfully, had the sense to not mock Seto for that. Instead, she texted back that she couldn’t wait to see the both of them. This left Seto with time to think regarding Atem’s little gift and eventually, he reopened the drawer that contained the gift. He couldn’t focus on work anymore anyway.

Dinner would have been a lot more casual if Seto could stop thinking about the nature of what Atem had asked of him. As it turns out, it was, indeed, a fantasy that Atem wanted to see in person. Atem liked to draw things out and take his time. This sometimes was frustrating for Seto, who wanted to ditch their reservations and just head home. He hated when Atem decided to toy with him like this, especially when Atem knew that public displays of affection were not Seto’s thing. This meant that Atem could simply tease and never actually touch him. He thought that barring Atem from putting his hands on him in public meant he was safe from this, but no. Somehow, Atem learned all the buttons he could press without ever laying a finger on Seto. Atem knew how to make Seto almost break into allowing public displays of affection. Seto figured that even if he wound up caving, Atem probably wouldn’t go along with it. For the most part, Atem tended to make sure that the lines stayed enforced. For that, Seto was somewhat grateful because he certainly did tend to lose his mind just a little bit around Atem.

Atem, by this point, was well aware of his effect on Seto too. Seto didn’t need to openly admit to the fact that he was in love with Atem for Atem to know. This was a new development, spurred on by Atem’s own confession. Despite this, Atem never seemed to really pressure Seto into saying it back. No, the only one applying pressure on himself was...himself. He had to face the truth there: he felt guilty that he had reacted so poorly to Atem’s confession. Atem had borne his soul and Seto reacted so stupidly that Seto’s cheeks burned bright red whenever he thought about it. He often said that he felt like he had to make something up to Atem, and Atem would consistently say that wasn’t true. Even tonight, as Seto said he owed Atem, Atem insisted that Seto owed him nothing.

This was a common argument at this point. Seto would insist that he owed Atem for being so ridiculous, and Atem would insist that Seto was allowed his feelings. That was infuriating, really. Atem was being considerate to the point where Seto almost felt insulted by it. He’d longed since learned that him feeling insulted did not mean Atem’s intentions were to insult, however. He’d gotten better at not blaming Atem for his emotions. His emotions were his and his problem alone. He had decided to stop unloading those emotions onto Atem for no reason. He had to.

Just like he wouldn’t blame Atem for his own stupid reactions to Atem’s words. Just because Atem would lean over to whisper that he really liked the photos did not mean that it was Atem’s fault that Seto’s pulse quickened. It wasn’t Atem’s fault that he was just so damn weak for him. He could certainly, however, blame Atem for taking his time with getting done with the meal. Atem had smirked midway through dinner when Seto asked if they could leave already, and told him to be patient. It almost felt like he was being scolded, and Seto was ashamed to admit he was into that. Bossy Atem was honestly the best version of Atem in Seto’s opinion.

It felt like it had taken forever before they wound up in the car together on the way back to Seto’s home. At this point, it was very clear that Atem had done a number on Seto...but honestly...who was counting? Who was keeping score? Seto was certain that even if he had been keeping score, he’d be losing. After all, Atem had quickly removed Seto’s shirt to reveal the black lace underneath and a smirk had appeared on his face. He’d whispered in Seto’s ear that he was so good to him before pressing kisses to his neck. Titling his head up for Atem to kiss his neck, Seto briefly allowed him to marvel in this moment of vulnerability. The neck was delicate, fragile, and a strong blow to it could kill him dead. Presenting himself openly to Atem was second nature at this point. But now he was fixated on just how open to Atem he was. He was trusting Atem with the most delicate parts of himself and trusting that Atem would bring pleasure rather than pain. That, in itself, made it even easier to surrender.

Sometimes Seto managed to get in a few scratches down Atem’s back before Atem got to pin him down. It felt like an elaborate game of cat and mouse at times. All Seto knew is that Atem absolutely had his number. Atem didn’t need to hear those words, did he? Atem didn’t need much, really. Seto wasn’t sure how to express his emotions but he knew what he felt in his heart. He knew that once they got to the house, Atem was going to pull him up the stairs to his room. And from there, he knew that Atem would have him cornered. From there, Atem would have him bent over his bed, moaning for Atem to just be rougher, begging him to break him in half.

From there, they would fall asleep in the same bed and then they’d wake up the next day. Atem had wound up having some clothes at Seto’s place, and Seto would try to not think too hard about that implication. It was no worse than the fact that he had clothes at Atem’s place. Really, at this point, Seto wasn’t sure which place constituted “home” for him. Both this house and Atem’s house were his place. Either way, they’d both pack their suitcases and make their way to the car that would take them to the Tokyo airport and once again, Seto would attempt to point out that if they simply took his private jet, they could leave from Domino. Atem would argue back that this route is more environmentally conscious, shutting down Seto’s insistence of flying private. And if Seto didn’t care about Atem, he absolutely would’ve called his pilot to get him out of this airport when he dealt with the masses. It felt like entirely too long before they were up in the air.

Up in the air, Seto tried to calm himself as he realized that he was reaching a point of now or never. If he did not open his mouth and told Atem how he felt now, he never would. In a way, being far away from the ground helped. He could distance himself from reality up in the clouds. He wished yet again that Atem had let them fly private. It made him feel all sorts of wrong to allow people that he did not know to see such a private and vulnerable moment. The main reason he had allowed Atem to insist on commercial was specifically because Atem made an argument that it was wasteful to fly private. It was hard to argue when he pulled out a ‘the environment would thank us’ argument, really. What could he say to that? ‘Fuck the environment’? No, Atem won that argument before it even started and now Seto was trying to confront that he wanted so bad to tell Atem that he loved him with no room for cover.

Eventually, one by one, everyone else in the first-class cabin went to sleep on this long flight. Seto had downed a drink in an attempt to soothe his nerves. Finally, when he could take it no more, he nudged Atem for his attention. Once again, he found Atem’s cool gray eyes on him with an intense stare. For once, Atem was make-up-less, and even worse was that it was not the make-up that was the cause of Atem’s beauty. No, Seto had the unfortunate discovery that the make-up was there to enhance his natural features. Atem naturally had long, thick eyelashes and pouty lips. Atem naturally had high cheekbones and a sharp jawline. It just wasn’t fair that someone be this beautiful. He had to speak before he lost his nerve. “I love you,” Seto managed to stumble out, clumsily. “I...I just thought you should know that.”

The words hung in the air for longer than Seto would like but he, at least, had the assurance that Atem felt the same way. It was still relaxing when Atem broke out into a smile and moved to lightly press his lips to Seto’s as his hand gently cradled Seto’s jaw. “I know,” Atem said with a light smirk and for once, Seto couldn’t bring himself to be angry at that response. Of course Atem knew. “Still...nice to hear that the man I love actually loves me back.”

Seto’s heart fluttered in his chest. Everyone here was asleep, that much was true, but Seto still had the flight attendants in mind. So he pulled back, a flush across his cheeks. “Later,” Seto promised and Atem understood. Seto never realized just how long the flight from Japan to America was. Never realized that there were layovers involved. Never realized how achingly long a journey could be when you were ready to be at the destination. He just wanted to be alone in his hotel room with Atem now. The one thing that kept him together was that Atem would consistently hold his hand, occasionally squeezing it. It was like a spark was sent through him every single time.

Atem knew the best way to keep Seto sane was to stay close. Seto had never realized just how _soothing_ Atem’s presence was. Atem just had this natural gravitas to him that just kept pulling him in. Occasionally, Seto would find the nerve to sneak a kiss and each time, Atem smiled against Seto’s lips. That was the part Seto liked the best. Atem had such a nice smile and the fact that _he_ was the cause of it... He still could barely find the words to explain his emotions. So many of the words he chose just sounded a little childish, a little too plain to fully encapsulate how he really felt. ‘Happy’ just didn’t sit right on him. It felt more than selfish to be happy when he had so many reasons to rail against the idea of it.

His mind was completely shot at the end of a long flight and all he wanted was to be in Atem’s arms. All he wanted was, specifically, to be alone with Atem. He’d forgotten that New York City traffic was a burden and that it would take time before they got to their hotel. Atem had decided to take the time during traffic to sleep some more, and Seto admired how Atem looked when he slept. Atem was usually so fierce that seeing Atem seem a little less burdened was nice. He simply was, with nothing that could possibly burden him. Seto had long wondered how Atem seemed so carefree and found out that there were pressures in Atem’s life. It’s just that unlike Seto, Atem was more than capable of faking it.

Atem was capable of holding himself together in a way that Seto could never hope to replicate. Seto constantly thought about all the ways that Atem seemed more capable than him. He was even the first to be willing to open himself up to the possibility of heartbreak, while Seto railed against it. Seto had pushed and pushed Atem away in hopes of keeping his heart safe. He’d believed there had been no reason to think Atem would ever love him back. He allowed himself to be content with stolen moments. And yet...Atem had made it very clear that it was Seto that he wanted. It was Seto that had Atem’s heart. That, in itself, was thrilling. All the burdens that they both had felt halved to Seto. He could only hope that he comforted Atem the same way Atem comforted him.

The hotel was the same as any other hotel, really. Just another room with plain white walls that tried to be grandiose. It didn’t matter. The way the room looked never mattered as long as Atem was with him. “So does tomorrow count as an official date,” Atem asked, half-awake and getting dressed into his pajamas.

Seto had never considered that this was another perk to things finally being settled between them. They loved each other and now...it was simple. Being alone with Atem was no longer a game of questioning everything Atem did and questioning if he had gone too far in his honesty. Rather, they could just _be_ and that included knowing that Atem was probably simply just jetlagged and wanting to sleep, the same as Seto. It didn’t feel like a rejection anymore when he knew Atem would be there in the morning. “A date?”

“Yeah,” Atem said with a light, soft grin that was bordering on teasing. “A date. You know, the thing couples do.”

“Oh,” Seto said before thinking this over. A date had been the last thing Seto thought he would ever want from Atem, but now? Now it sounded just lovely. “Do we have to tell your friends that’s what’s going on?”

Atem laughed. “Pretty sure they’re your friends too now,” Atem joked as he moved to give Seto a soft kiss on the cheek. Seto flushed at this unexpected display of affection. “Sorry to say that dating me comes with the perk of having friends. Or in your case, the downside of having friends.”

Seto rolled his eyes, the desire to be contradictory overcoming the surge of affection he felt at those words and the mere concept of Atem’s friends being his as well. “You and your insistence on having friends.”

Atem had the damn audacity to laugh at this as well, as if Seto was making jokes. Of course, no matter what Seto insisted, Atem and his friends would continue to force their care on him. Then again...wasn’t that part of the appeal of dating Atem? That no matter what, he’d be...cared for. He didn’t know how to react to that. “Please, it won’t be so bad,” Atem said as he moved over to wrap his arms around Seto’s waist, pulling him towards the bed with a light laugh. “Didn’t you ever go on group dates in high school? You know, the group dates your parents make you go on, ‘cause they’re worried you’ll ruin your life or something by dating.”

Seto stiffened. That’s right: he never told Atem about his family. “Er, no,” Seto said, awkwardly. “My birth parents died when I was young, and my adoptive father died when I was 15. And…I didn’t really date in high school, either.”

“Oh,” Atem said awkwardly, loosening his grip on Seto. “I...I didn’t know.”

“I don’t make it a point to tell total strangers what happened,” Seto said, matter of fact. “But I thought everyone was aware of what happened to my adoptive father.”

“Truth be told, I never really looked into your family business,” Atem said with a shrug. “Yugi never mentioned what happened to the previous owner of Kaiba Corp, so I assumed it wasn’t important.”

“It’s not,” Seto said shortly, not wanting to go into why it wasn’t a tragedy his adoptive father died, but wanting to make it very clear that his adoptive father was not someone to mourn. “Er... It kind of ties back to why I don’t celebrate my birthday, actually.”

Atem seemed surprised by this and moved to actually sit on the bed, looking up at Seto as his hands moved to grip Seto’s hips. “Are you going to tell me the story of why you don’t celebrate your birthday,” he asked softly, “or would you rather not talk about it?”

Seto knew what Atem was doing here: he was offering him an out. Atem always offered Seto an out when things got just a little too heavy. He seemed to understand that Seto barely liked talking about his feelings, and seemed aware that it was hard for Seto to do. Still... “No, er... The thing ~~s~~ is, my adoptive father killed himself,” Seto said awkwardly. “The reason I had my birthday scrubbed is because...well, it falls on the same day he died, and the same day I took control of Kaiba Corp.”

If Atem was surprised by this, his expression betrayed nothing. Then again, Seto still had a difficult time reading Atem at times. “That’s...a hell of a day,” Atem said slowly and carefully, as if he was choosing his words as he said them. “Do you miss your adoptive father at all? Or...is it good he died?”

“I... I don’t know,” Seto admitted, realizing now his feelings on the matter were much more complicated than previously thought. He thought he understood his own emotions, but now he was starting to understand that things were not as simple as he wanted them to be. He hated that his emotions had gone from “easy to pin down” to complicated and vast. He’d blame Atem except...he was fairly certain this had been the case for far longer than he wanted to admit. “I mean, he was an awful piece of shit, but...”

Atem cut him off with a look of concern in his silver eyes that made Seto feel slightly uncomfortable. “What do you mean when you say ‘awful’?”

Seto couldn’t help but be pulled in by Atem’s intense gaze again. He felt rather dizzy and suddenly just a little too vulnerable. “Er... I’d rather not talk about it,” Seto said, realizing that went too deep for right now. Not only that, he’d revealed to Atem more pieces of himself than he’d ever told anyone else. That was enough for tonight. “Uh, how about we go back to talking about...tomorrow being a _date_. I’d rather focus on that.”

“We can focus on whatever you’d like,” Atem said as he pulled Seto towards him with a light frown on his face. As much as Seto was sure Atem wanted to press and know more, he also knew when to pull off from a topic. Every time Seto had said he was uncomfortable so far, Atem respected it and willingly went along with each awkward topic change. Seto was grateful for that. “Yugi and Jonouchi will probably be there, so it’d be a group date thing in addition to Anzu and Kisara... Probably Yugi’s cousin Mai and my cousin Isis, who are also a thing... Entirely likely Malik will show up with his boyfriend who I’ve never actually met too but... we can always have a proper solo date the next night.”

This alarmed Seto. “Sorry, did you just say your family is going to show up?”

“Just the cousins,” Atem said with a light shrug. “Isis and Malik are friends with Anzu as well. In fact, I suspect Malik likes Anzu more than he likes me.”

“Oh,” Seto said, not sure if that warranted the same level of panic as being introduced to Atem’s parents. Did people usually feel fear about being introduced to their significant other’s parents? He would assume they did. Then again, not every single parent was some high-ranking political official in a country that explicitly outlawed homosexuality. “I’m...assuming meeting your parents is off the table?”

Atem frowned at this. “Not...exactly,” Atem said with a sigh before laying back on the bed. “Uh, the reason my parents sent me to live outside of Egypt was...because they accepted me. But they knew that I wouldn’t be accepted by the rest of the country.” He paused thoughtfully, seemingly staring up at the ceiling. “It’s better than how Malik and Isis’s parents reacted, I guess. Their father nearly tried to kill Malik. If my father hadn’t intervened...” He trailed off, shuddering. “It wasn’t a very nice family dinner, let’s just leave it at that.”

Normally Atem was quick to share intimate details of himself. For him to not share this, Seto assumed it had to have been bad. Whatever happened, it wasn’t up for discussion. And Seto had to imagine Malik wouldn’t want to talk about it either. As much as Seto hated not knowing things, he knew when to not push. “Alright,” he said as he moved to lay down next to Atem, staring up at the popcorn ceiling. “I won’t push. But...you mean to say...your parents wouldn’t object to meeting me?”

“No,” Atem said, turning over to give Seto a soft smile. “I imagine they’d think I did pretty well for myself, landing a CEO of all things.”

Seto couldn’t fathom the idea of having such a relationship. Atem was bringing with him a family that Seto never had. For the longest time, he had to play the role of parent to Mokuba. The concept of a set of parents was impossible for Seto to wrap his mind around. He thought the perks of Atem ended with friendships, but it seemed now that extended out into family. “And tomorrow I’m meeting...two members of your family. Your cousins.”

“Don’t worry too hard about it,” Atem said quickly. “They’re very nice and I’m sure they’ll like you. They both play Duel Monsters too, you know...just...not competitively. Malik can tell you all about the inaccuracies in Duel Monsters regarding the ancient Egyptian version of the game it’s based on.”

“Duel Monsters is based on a game from ancient Egypt,” Seto asked, surprised. “I thought Pegasus just made it all up.”

Atem laughed, shaking his head. “Nah, it’s based on some drawings found in some dead Pharaoh’s tomb,” Atem said as Seto tried to wrap his mind around how this never came up. He would think Atem would be quick to mention how the game they played was based on something from his own culture. If Seto knew Duel Monsters was based on something from Japan, he’d never shut up about it. “Malik has an interest in ancient Egypt and so he knows a bit about the theories of how the original Duel Monsters might’ve been played. The version in the Pharaoh’s tomb is very different from the modern game. It seems the Pharaoh didn’t know how to use spell or trap cards.”

“If that’s the case, I bet I could totally trounce that ancient Pharaoh at his own game,” Seto said with a smirk.

“Shame you have to find a shitty player to find someone to beat,” Atem said, a smirk playing on his face. “Since you can’t beat me.”

“Well, you _are_ the only person I consider worthy of being a rival,” Seto said, more matter of fact than he intended. “In fact... I think the fact you can kick my ass might be the single hottest thing about you.”

“I would’ve thought my abs were the single hottest thing about me,” Atem said, a mock wounded look playing on his face as he moved to pin Seto to the bed. “Are you telling me I’m not completely sexy?”

As Seto was about to comment that of course everything about Atem was attractive, he found himself unable to speak as Atem captured his lips in an intense kiss. Seto gasped as Atem’s mouth found his neck and well, from there, Atem had managed to completely distract Seto from the original point of the conversation. Then again... Seto couldn’t quite figure out what the point of the conversation was to begin with, so he supposed it didn’t matter in the end.

Atem actually cleaned up very well. It seemed he was aware that he couldn’t dress as he normally would for the theater and instead had opted for a silver jacket with a white button-down shirt underneath and dark purple slacks. The silver jacket seemed to match Atem’s eyes perfectly. Once again, Seto had to wonder what Atem was doing with him when he could be with just about anyone he wanted. It was strange knowing that this was how Atem was dressing specifically to go on a date with him. He felt a little bit giddy at the prospect. It was something to distract from meeting two members of Atem’s family. Atem had already met Mokuba, so Seto figured that it was only fair at this point. Still, he was nervous about all the ways this could go wrong. He didn’t understand how Atem could be so relaxed. “What if they don’t like me?”

“Well, I wouldn’t take it personally,” Atem said, musing over this. “Malik doesn’t like a lot of people.”

Seto rolled his eyes. Of course Atem would still be making jokes at a time like this. Couldn’t he see that he was nervous about meeting his cousins? “I see you know what I mean, then.”

In response, Atem simply rubbed Seto’s shoulders and grinned at Seto. Seto was absolutely obsessed with that grin of his, actually. “Okay, seriously then. Isis is fairly chill and easy to get along with,” he said as he pressed a soft, soothing kiss to Seto’s temple. “And well, Malik’s got a little bit of trauma going on. It takes him a while to trust people and takes him even longer to like someone. You just have to take your time with him. Sorta like you, actually.”

“In that case, I suppose I shouldn’t bring up that I know about his trauma then, correct?”

“How would it even come up,” Atem asked, looking a little bewildered and as if he was struggling to understand something. “Were you planning on starting the conversation with, ‘Hi, my adoptive father was a piece of shit and I heard your father was too, let’s be friends’?”

Seto didn’t want to admit that had been exactly how he planned on bonding with Malik after seeing how judgmental Atem was towards the idea. “Well, probably not exactly like that,” Seto said with a frown, trying to figure out exactly what was wrong with the suggestion. Atem was always badgering him about opening up to people, after all. “Aren’t you the one who’s always telling me I shouldn’t be so buttoned up all the time, though?”

Atem looked absolutely stunned. “You wouldn’t even tell me your own birthday for months,” he exclaimed. “You’re telling me that your first thought on how best to approach my cousin, who was nearly the victim of a hate crime in front of the entire family, was to tell him, ‘Hey, that’s rough bro, my dad sucked too’? What happened to keeping everything to yourself?”

“I mean, some things are just personal,” Seto said with a shrug, not sure what Atem’s problem was.

Atem sighed, shaking his head. “But you might talk about your daddy issues with a stranger.”

Seto paused. “Well, if you phrase it that way, it does sound inconsistent,” he said, conceding to Atem’s point with a frown. “It’s just... It’s different, okay?”

“Then explain it to me.”

Once again, Atem had his number. Seto had no explanation that would work in this situation. “Fine, you may have a point,” Seto said. “I’m sorry I took forever to tell you my birthday.”

This concession seemed to satisfy Atem, and the rest of the ride to the theatre was rather uneventful. Seto never thought that he’d be in a position where he could just be with someone. They just were and that was rather nice. At the theater, the first person they ran into was Anzu. This made sense, considering the fact that Anzu was the director of the show and had to be there earlier than everyone else. Not only that, but they were rather early themselves. They had overcompensated for traffic in New York and wound up at the theater forty-five minutes early. Anzu seemed frustrated over something. “Seto, Atem,” she said, sounding slightly out of breath too. “Glad you guys could make it! Do you guys wanna meet the playwright?”

Atem answered for Seto with a casual affirmation. Anzu then introduced them to a rather thin, pale woman with white hair and bright blue eyes and a rather off-putting aura to her. Seto felt the need to tense up, as if she could somehow hurt him. Something about this playwright just radiated quiet strength. He felt if she wanted to, she could easily snap both him and Atem in half. “Hello,” she said, her voice a lot softer and higher pitched than Seto would expect. “I am Kisara Maccini. It is nice to meet you. Anzu has told me much about you both.”

If Seto was asked to describe the person he believed to have written the play that Anzu had shared with him all those months ago, Kisara would not have been it. It had taken him some time to process that she was also tall, almost as tall as he is. If he had to guess, he would think she was 6’, perhaps even 6’1”. She vaguely reminded him of a dragon, but he could not pin down how. She was staring him down and Seto felt like he should run. This is not the person he would imagine writing romantic comedies. He would think she was Anzu’s bodyguard if he had not been told otherwise. He didn’t understand how Atem, who was so much shorter than him, could still be so relaxed and at ease. “Nice to meet you,” Atem said with a grin. “I’m assuming you’re the girlfriend Anzu’s been hyping up?”

“Is that the reason you wanted to make this play so bad,” Seto asked, surprised to realize that Anzu might have had an ulterior motive beyond embarrassing him.

Anzu looked a little embarrassed. “Well, no, it’s because she’s a good writer but... I guess I did suppose that I could pull some connections so everyone can see what an amazing talent she is,” she said, rubbing the back of her neck and looking just a little bit sheepish. “I mean, you know I wouldn’t have brought it to you if I didn’t like it, Seto.”

Did he? “Thank you,” Kisara said, still so much quieter than Seto would expect. Not only that, but she also seemed to not say more than she needed. “Anzu encouraged me for most of it. I would not have been able to write it without her.”

“Oh, I just encouraged you,” she said, bouncing on her heels. “You’re totally creative. You would’ve gotten it without me.”

Kisara smiled softly as she moved to lightly take Anzu’s hand in hers. It was amazing how the move was both possessive and protective. “I could not have written this without my muse,” Kisara stated, rather plainly and openly. “Truly, it is an honor that my work is in your capable hands, Anzu.”

Anzu seemed a little flustered as she leaned into Kisara with a soft smile across her face, seeming to relax just a little more. Once again, Seto didn’t understand how Anzu and Atem could be so relaxed around Kisara. Seto was certain that she could kill him in one swoop if she wanted to. To his great surprise, Atem mirrored the move and took his hand into his. It felt like lightning was buzzing up along his arm. “I’m sure it’ll be great,” Atem said with a grin. “I’ve been looking forward to seeing it these past six months.”

Atem squeezed his hand and Seto felt dizzy. It seemed like now Atem was bold ever since Seto had started opening up to him. Atem held little regard for the idea that he should hide anything. Seto couldn’t imagine risking his life for anything and yet from what little Seto knew of Atem’s family, Atem had been willing to risk his life on multiple occasions to be open and free. He didn’t understand how Atem even existed at this point. It was like there was a buzzing noise in his ears. He barely noticed the conversation and instead was fixated on how casual and open Atem was with claiming him. It seemed to mirror how Kisara was equally bold and brave in her claim of Anzu.

He was fixated on how Atem never pulled his hand away first. He’d never noticed that before. It was always him who pulled away first and he wondered if that bothered Atem. He wondered a lot of the time if something he did was bothering Atem. He just couldn’t stop thinking about it.

The first of Atem’s cousins joined them and he had to assume this was Isis Ishtar. She was also tall and Seto wondered how Atem could be related to so many tall people and still be so short himself. A tall blonde woman was standing next to her with sharp eyes and a smirk on her face. “Er, I’m assuming you’re Isis, Atem’s cousin,” Seto said to the tall, dark skinned woman. “I don’t know who you are, however.”

The blonde woman laughed. “Surprised Atem didn’t mention me at all,” she said as she stuck her hand out to Seto and it took a minute for Seto to process that she expected him to shake her hand. Awkwardly, he lightly took her hand and he discovered she had a mean grip on her. Suddenly, Seto realized he did recognize this woman before she ever introduced herself. “I’m Mai, Yugi’s cousin.”

Mai Kujaku, Seto realized. She was a fairly talented duelist and a fairly well-known model. The last time Seto had seen this woman, she was advertising a high-end luxury fashion brand. He thought that she had a boyfriend, however. He supposed that it must’ve been a funny rumor. Surprisingly, he realized that Isis Ishtar was familiar too in the same way that Mai was and for her, Seto had been under the impression she was single. He supposed it made sense. They both had rather symmetrical faces and rather sharp jawlines. Still, he couldn’t see how he was supposed to be impressed with them for having scientifically beautiful faces. “Not what I think most people would recognize you for,” Seto remarked before he could stop himself. For the most part it was fairly taboo to mention the types of careers all of them had at this point. “I saw one of your adverts last time I went to buy a belt.”

Isis’s eyes narrowed at Seto and he felt like she was judging him. He tried to remind himself that Atem had said that Isis wasn’t mean. Clearly, he was simply being paranoid. “I wouldn’t think a CEO such as yourself would do his own shopping,” she remarked, and to his surprise, she had defaulted to English. Even worse: her English was perfect compared to his. She spoke it rather quickly. It took him a few moments to properly translate in his head what she was saying. “I personally prefer to let someone else handle that.”

Atem then said something to Isis in what sounded like Swiss German, though Seto could not be sure. He was starting to wish he never admitted to Atem that he didn’t know how speak German despite being able to read it. All he knew was that it was a language he did not speak and from the looks on everyone else’s faces, they did not speak it either. Isis had a small smirk on her face as she replied back, to which Atem immediately looked flustered before switching back to Japanese. “Mai, where’s Yugi,” he asked, clearly just looking for a quick change of subject. “Did he get caught up in work again?”

Was it weird for Seto to start immediately overthinking Atem and Isis’s conversation? He had no idea what they had discussed and all he knew is Atem immediately changed the subject...to Yugi. Not only that, but it was also starting to hit Seto that perhaps Isis _was_ judging him. Did Isis not approve of him? Did Isis actually secretly hate his guts? Did Isis think he didn’t speak enough languages? Was he too tall for Atem? Too pale? “He and Jonouchi are caught in traffic,” Mai said with a roll of her eyes. “Yugi texted me to say that they were on 85th getting dinner and they left about five minutes ago. Told them to get dinner after.”

“Makes sense,” Anzu interjected. “Jonouchi always runs late and of course he’s dragging Yugi down with him.”

She sounded rather dismissive and that surprised Seto. He’s never heard her once be dismissive like that. “Don’t be mean to Jonouchi, Anzu,” Atem said, a rather playful grin on his face. “He’s trying his best. Besides, it’s probably for the best they got food first. Jonouchi wouldn’t be able to sit still if he’s hungry.”

“I’m not being mean,” Anzu replied and Seto was shocked by how defensive Anzu sounded. Anzu opened her mouth as if she was about to say something else when Jonouchi and Yugi arrived, as if on cue.

“Sorry,” Yugi said, looking rather sheepish. “We got swarmed as we were leaving the restaurant. Couple of people recognized Jou and I and well…we got caught up taking pictures and signing things for people.”

“So are you now going to admit that you’re famous,” Atem teased without missing a beat. “Or are you going to continue to insist that you just have a really wide circle of friends?” At no point did Seto ever consider that Yugi would not think of himself as famous. It seemed obvious to anyone that everyone here had some level of recognition for varying reasons. He wondered how Yugi could’ve missed something so obvious. Atem’s gaze snapped over to Seto, a brow raised. “Something you wanna say, Kaiba?”

Alarm bells went off in Seto’s head. Could Atem read his mind? There was something knowing in those silver-gray eyes that seemed more aware than Seto would like. In fact, it seemed like Atem always seemed to have his number from the jump. Before he could say anything, Atem’s fingers linked with his, ever so gentle and Seto found that he couldn’t think of a single thing to say in response to Atem’s question. Suddenly, nothing mattered but the fact the two of them were here together. In fact, time seemed to both slow down and speed up whenever he was around Atem. He wasn’t sure how they wound up in the theater, the curtain rising, with Atem’s hand locked with his.

Overall, Seto couldn’t think of a single complaint to have about the show. In fact, he could barely remember the show at all. What he remembered was how Atem looked in the lowlight of the theater and the reactions Atem had to the show. He couldn’t exactly complain when Atem took his hand in his and smiled at him. Atem’s head had come to rest on his shoulder and Seto was surprised at how easy it felt. They said good night to their friends and Seto wondered how he’d lived without these friends before. He didn’t understand how he’d been going through life without Atem in it like this. They got in the car and all Seto could think of how just a year ago, Seto had been so certain that the way he’d been living life was just fine. In the car, Atem had pressed a quick kiss to his lips and Seto was surprised how easy it was to give in. Now, as they were being driven back home, Seto was just so grateful that he’d allowed himself to fall. It was a lot of trust he had in Atem. A lot of faith, but Atem had been willing to provide a soft place to land. And in the end...that was enough.


End file.
